Girl #1: It's like putting a band-aid on when you need stitches.
Girl #2: Oh, thats a good one.
Girl #3: Yeah, and then the band-aid falls off and it gets infected.
Girl #1: And then you get gangrene and you leg falls off.
Girl #3: Only we could be trying to be supportive and morbid at the same time…
Belleville, Pennsylvania
Guy: I've heard that old people have the stickiest fingers.
Arvada, Colorado
Bathroom chick #1: So he had three piercings up there and two down there…
Bathroom chick #2: He said he had one that would get her off on her clit if they did it doggie style.
Bathroom chick #1: But what if her clit was pierced too? And his piercings on her clit?
Chilkoot Charlies
Anchorage, Alaska
Businessman on cell: I could barely see over her head, dude! It was like reading Klingon for the first time.
Independence Avenue
Washington, DC
Girl #1: Okay, so my sister was watching Pokemon the other day, and asked me a question about it, and I don't know what to tell her.
Girl #2: Well, what is it?
Girl #1: She was wondering, since there are no animals in the show, like cows or anything, if when they ate meat they were eating Pokemon.
Girl #2: Don't tell her the truth, it'll break her nerdy little heart.
Utah
Girl in restroom #1: I just found an eyelash in my bellybutton!
Girl in restroom #2: Is it yours?
Girl in restroom #1: Yeah…I think.
Auburn University Student Union
Auburn, Alabama
Instructor to swim class: Okay, who can tell me one thing we can wear to protect ourselves from the sun?
Three-year-old boy, after much thought: Teeth!
YMCA
Easton, Pennsylvania
Guy on porch to girl with big boobs in low-cut top: I love me some triple Ds!
Girl with big boobs in low-cut top: Good call!
Rutgers University
New Brunswick, New Jersey
Furry man to girlfriend, loudly: So does your sister, like, *never* shave her legs?
Rutgers University
New Brunswick, New Jersey
Drunk girl at pub table: It's just that guys get sex changes all the time and then realize it's not so fun. They just think it'd be awesome to have boobs.
London
England
Overheard by: Grew her own boobs.
