Guy: Do you know how I know you were singing correctly?
Girl: You saw me sucking in my stomach?
Guy: No. When you started spitting at me!
Girl: I can't help that I have great diction!
Saint Peter's College
New Jersey
Guy: Do you know how I know you were singing correctly?
Girl: You saw me sucking in my stomach?
Guy: No. When you started spitting at me!
Girl: I can't help that I have great diction!
Saint Peter's College
New Jersey
College girl: The way I see it, chemistry is just like prostitution.
Northern Michigan University
Overheard by: everyone gets screwed?
Student: What would Elvis say?
Professor: What would Plato say?
Student: What would Butler say?
Campbell: What would Foucault say?
Girl in back row: All I know is he broke a table.
University of Mary Washington
Fredericksburg, Virginia
Overheard by: elvis eavesdropper
Female student: I came home last night and found my roommate sitting on the kitchen floor, crying and holding a bottle of Jägermeister and a recipe for homemade enchiladas.
Dumb friend: I didn't know you made enchiladas with Jägermeister.
University of Colorado, Boulder
Girl to girl and guy: Guys, can I just tell you about my weekend?
(no reply)
Girl again: Can I tell ya'll about my weekend?
(they look at her and nod)
Girl again, whispering: It had to do with a penis…
UNCC Campus
Charlotte, North Carolina
Biology professor: You're getting me all nervous about my penis… Which I measure daily.
Community College
Illinois
Girl in puffy pink coat: I went to Jared's yesterday and I was all like, “you're a jerk.” Know what I mean?
Girl in puffy white coat: I dunno. My nails are orange.
Illinois institute
Overheard by: abbie
Library patron: I'm a molecular biologist. I don't care about things I can see with my eyes.
UC Berkeley
Berkeley, California
Overheard by: MaggieB
Chick #1: She's on a date with a French guy.
(pause)
Chick #2: I bet French cock is like an eclair.
University of Denver, Colorado
Professor, discussing types of fat: Babies aren't fat like… (points at a fat girl) No, I don't want to say that… like my tummy.
University of Georgia
