Drunken teenage girl, dancing down the street: I taste like fucking condoms!
Toronto, Canadia
Drunken teenage girl, dancing down the street: I taste like fucking condoms!
Toronto, Canadia
(during a film in a movie theater)
Girl #1 (whispering): Ow, something's itching me–I think there's something in my bra. (gasps) Oh my god!
Girl #2: What is it!?
Girl #1: I just found a condom in my bra and I think it was from last night but I don't remember putting it there!
Ontario
Canadia
Plus-size sistah: And that damn condom came off!
Friend: Oh, shit, girl! What happened?
Plus-size sistah: I dunno. It's still up in there.
Friend: What? How long?
Plus-size sistah: It's been three days. I can't reach that bitch!
Friend: Girl! That's nasty! And if you askin' what I think you askin', you can forget it!
Restaurant, Chinatown
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Joe
Guy: But I hate wearing condoms! I can’t feel anything. I might as well put my dick in a cereal box.
Girl: I think my vagina is a bit different from a cereal box.
Dude, excitedly: If your vagina had cereal in it, I’d eat you out all the time!
Davidson, North Carolina
Girl #1, throwing home pregnancy test into friend's basket: Here, I think you need this.
Girl #2, throwing box of condoms into friend's basket: Not as much as you need these, you slut.
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Erica
Neighbor: Dude, condoms don't work on dogs.
Lawrence, Kansas
Teen: And when I woke up, everything in my purse was covered by a condom.
Auckland
New Zealand
Overheard by: At least it was protected
Guy #1, during pride festival: Why do I have to carry all the condoms!?
Guy #2: Because you have the biggest pockets!
Bellingham, Washington
Girl to friends: Did he use a condom? No, never mind, you don’t use a condom when you’re fucking grapefruit.
Montreal
Canadia
Sister: Grandma got him a box of latexes!
Dad: Oh, well, I didn't know you and grandma were so…ahem…close.
Brother: Oh! God! No! Stop! My ears!
Reston, Virginia
Overheard by: Carly
