Hungover conference attendee: Ugh, it's early.
Appalled conference attendee, scooting chair away: You smell like a dead hooker covered in alcoholic bum piss. And avocado.
Conference Center
Las Vegas, Nevada
Hungover conference attendee: Ugh, it's early.
Appalled conference attendee, scooting chair away: You smell like a dead hooker covered in alcoholic bum piss. And avocado.
Conference Center
Las Vegas, Nevada
Guy at party: You know, if I tell you it's 'cause I tell you, if not…why would I tell you?
Leon
Mexico
Overheard by: Oscar
Drunk girl #1: I’m Wells Fargo!
Drunk girl #2: Really? I’m Wells Fargo, too!
(they gleefully skip off together)
Pearl St Mall
Boulder, Colorado
Guy to friend: And then she said, “I am not even half the man she used to be.”
Oxford
England
Overheard by: Well, she WAS born in Germany
Older man walking into a jewelery store, to another: I'm not a sugar-daddy, am I?
Fashion Valley Mall
San Diego, California
Teenage girl: Oh for gods sake, just buy the tractor- it's about a million right? You can afford it!
2nd teenage girl: Yeah you're right, I can afford it.
Gold Coast, Queensland, Australia
College girl to three friends, completely serious: Yeah, I guess his penis had epilepsy or something.
College Dining Hall
Pennsylvania
Hipster guy: I cried so much when I watched it.
Hipster girl: It's a Wonderful Life made you cry? Ha!
Hipster guy: Shhhh! (looks around furtively)
Wellington
New Zealand
30-something male drunk: You're not my mother!
20-something female drunk: I'm not your mother. I'm just telling you that it's not okay to grunt and lunge at people.
Pacifica, California
Overheard by: Slightly
Mom: No! Don't walk on that! (kid continues to walk on grass) I hope you step in dog shit.
Capitol Hill
Washington, DC
Overheard by: christa
