HS boy #1: I love cheesecake in my mouth.
HS boy #2: You love dick in your mouth!!
HS boy #1: Well, yeah, if it has cheesecake on it!
Christiansburg, Virginia
Boyfriend: If we were in person right now, I would totally suck your face right now.
Girlfriend: We *are* in person.
Boyfriend: Oh, yeah.
(they walk on casually)
Memorial City Mall
Houston, Texas
Hobo: Got any change?
Skinny JAP, walking away quickly: No, sorry.
Hobo, yelling after her: Well, fuck you then! You look fat in that dress!
Skinny JAP, turning around: You know, I'm starting to see why some people light you guys on fire!
Los Angeles, California
Drunken #20-something club girl: "and then the same exact thing happened as the last time I fell down the stairs."
Dragonfly Lounge, Cleveland, OH
Girl to guy: I think that should be my new catch phrase, “I want my pigeons!” But what does that even mean?
Guy: If we knew that, all the world's problems would be solved.
The Star Bar
Atlanta, Georgia
Professor: I want you to write about the first time you did something. It can be anything. The first time you rode a bike. The first time you made a baby. (awkward pause) Wait!
Syracuse University
New York
Girl on cell: We’re going to vibe her vagina. Well, not vibe it.
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: K
Random guy: He's like a cross between Michael Jackson and a Swiss Army knife.
University
England
