Can I Get a Swig?

Hobo: Girl, I know you’re a freak! All redheads are freaks!
Brunette hipster pumping gas: Step off. What I do is none of your business.
Hobo: Lady, I’m just talking shit ’cause I’m drunk.
Brunette hipster: Me, too.

Kansas City, Missouri

Overheard by: cuspy

Posted on December 5, 2019
Drinking & drunks, Hipsters, Hobos, Missouri

And That’s Enough Drinking for Both of You!

Little boy #1: Cheers to Australia!
Little boy #2: Cheers to my bicycle!
Little boy #1: Cheers to my water!
Little boy #2: Cheers to my willie!
Mom: Stop that! I told you not to cheers to your willie anymore.

Rottnest Island
Australia

Overheard by: Jersey Girl

Posted on November 26, 2019
Australia, Drinking & drunks, Kids

This Is Still Lindsay Lohan's Most Functional Relationship to Date

Drunk lesbian to sober girlfriend: Aw, I wanna puke but I can't!
Sober girlfriend: I would punch you in the stomach if you wanted …that's how much I love you.
Drunk lesbian: Awww, that's sweet.

Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: Claire

Posted on October 31, 2019
Compliments, Default, Drinking & drunks, Girls, Lesbos, Stomach, Violence, Washington

Stop Being White in Popeye’s!

Black girl #1: Okay, I know what I’m getting. Do you know what you’re getting?
White girl: I’ve never been here before. Let me look for a while. [Pauses, then yells.] Wait a minute! Popeye’s a sailor; Why does he sell chicken?
Black girl #2: Oh my god, shut up now or no more vodka for you for the rest of the night!
White girl: Okay. [Giggles.] I’m sorry.
[Black girls start talking to each other.]White girl, yelling: Why are there no white people in here?!
Black girl #1: Aww fuck, take her outside to the car. This is her first and last time ever coming here!

Popeye’s
Trenton, New Jersey

Posted on October 12, 2019
Advice, Black people, Compare and contrast, Drinking & drunks, Drunks, Food, Friends, Girls, New Jersey, Questions, Race, Restaurants, Threats, Wishes

Wanna Race?

Drunk girl puking in bathroom stall to drunk girl puking in stall next to her: It's okay! I'm throwing up too!

Wake Forest University
Winston-Salem, North Carolina

Posted on September 12, 2019
Colleges & Universities, Compare and contrast, Default, Drinking & drunks, Drunks, Girls, Health & Hygiene, North Carolina

I Just Want to Know I Can Get Drunk If I Have to

Chick: I want to put them in my underwear drawer instead of drinking them.

Monterey, California

Posted on September 9, 2019
California, Chicks, Drinking & drunks

Israelis Will Even Give You an Argument About That

Drunk black gangster guy, on Tel Aviv centennial celebration: I am Moses! I am Moses!
(traffic light changes, he throws arms up in air) Israelis, you may now walk!

Tel Aviv
Israel

Overheard by: E-lad