Pickings Seem to Be Slim in Iowa

College girl #1: So I met up with Jeremy last night.
College girl #2: Ah, the one with the small penis. Wait… No, Adam has the small dick. Jeremy’s the bad kisser, right?
College girl #1: To be fair, they’re both bad kissers. But yeah, Adam’s the one with the small dick.

Coffee shop
Iowa City, Iowa

Posted on October 13, 2017
Bars & Clubs, Bimbettes, Chicks, Compare and contrast, Default, Friends, Gossip, Iowa, K-I-S-S-I-N-G, Penis, Sexuality, Students

And Perhaps Buy a Special Bra.

Girl to friends: Mine is, like, nubby!
Friend: You should probably get that checked out…

Culver, Indiana

Posted on September 25, 2017
Advice, Friends, Girls, Health & Hygiene, Indiana

… After I Broke in and Changed All Your Answers to “Masturbation”?

Student: Yeah, she said ‘good luck’ to me. [Friend rolls eyes and shakes head.] I know. It’s the University of Toronto — she doesn’t mean ‘good luck.’ What she really means is ‘I hope you choke on a toothpick and die so I can get your spot in the program.’
Friend, sighing: It really is a shame this school has to be so competitive… How’d you do on that last test?

University of Toronto
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: A+

Posted on September 12, 2017
Canadia, Colleges & Universities, Default, Friends, Gripes, Insults, Lies, Students, Stupidity

Or, Rather, Your Failure to Step There

Guy: She makes her own salsa, too! And God, it’s good. Almost better than sex with a stranger, though I wouldn’t know what that was like.
Girl: I’m also a salsa maker.
Guy, laughing: Well, hello random…
Girl: No, we were talking about your mom making salsa… Until your side-trip to stranger-sex-land.

Huntington Beach, California

Overheard by: Jeff

Posted on September 7, 2017
California, Food, Friends, Gossip

In Cambridge? Perish the Thought.

Girl to friend: We're under a bridge! I feel like a crack dealer.

Midsummer Common
Cambridge, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Anti-Math

Posted on August 21, 2017
Crimes, Drugs, Friends, Girls, Massachusetts, Stupidity

Many People Feel That Way About Courtney Love

40-something female suit to friends: I just wanted to cover her in Lysol!

San Jose, California

Overheard by: Wondering what the rest of the conversation was…

Posted on August 20, 2017
California, Cleanliness, Friends, Suits, Weirdness, Wishes

Ironically, the Skirt Has a Silver Lining

Girl in uniform: So when I went to pick up my uniform there were no skirts. So my mom was like “My daughter needs bottoms.”
Friend: That sucks!
Girl in uniform: Yeah, the skirt I’m wearing now belongs to this girl who was deported to Trinidad.

Toronto
Canadia

Overheard by: Myr

Posted on August 19, 2017
Canadia, Clothes, Default, Education, Feelings, Friends, Geography, Girls, Politics, Teens

That's Why Raccoons Wash Their Food First

Guy: When I went down on him, I realized he didn't shower.
Friend: Gross.
Guy: Yeah, I wasn't even gagging because of his dick, but because of his foul stench.

UC
Berkeley, California