Student, about assignment she's written: It's supposed to be (emphasizes with hands) that, that, then that, then that! But it's all blah blah blah blah! You know?
Friend: Is you introduction all dot, dot, dot at least?
Student: Yeah.
University of South Australia
Adelaide
Australia
Overheard by: fellow stressed out uni student
Guy with limp: I went up to a teacher and was like, “are you sexually aroused by my limp?”
Friend: What did she say?
Guy with limp: He didn't say anything, but I knew he was.
Kingston High School
Kingston, New York
Girl telling friend about dream: So then I was lying on a bed of beef jerky and my dad came up and his armpit hair was all white and fuzzy and that's when I realized I was gonna die.
Park
California
Blonde in jacket: I know this guy that totally disemboweled a bomb using only a toothpick.
Demeaning guy friend: “Disemboweled”?
Blonde in jacket: With nothing but a toothpick! Isn't that incredible?
Denny's
St. Louis, Missouri
Overheard by: Gabe
Dude #1: I heard they were trying to get The Beach Boys for that motorcycle rally.
Dude #2: Man, that really says a lot about who is riding motorcycles these days. And it’s not good.
Lone Star Floathouse & Grill
New Braunfels, Texas
Overheard by: D2
Girl #1: You can’t just not smell his pillow.
Girl #2: I know, right? Just smell as hard as you can!
Macalester College
St Paul, Minnesota
Overheard by: isa
Restaurant owner: Hey! I want you to come in here — I got something that, when you put it in your mouth, it’s gonna knock your socks off.
Regular: Oh, yeah? Is it a food or a drink?
Restaurant owner: Well, both, actually…
4th Street
Rochester, Michigan
Thug #1: Why the hell are you going all the way to back of the train car? Why don’t we sit in the front like that Martha Stewart woman?
Thug #2: What the fuck are you talking about Martha Stewart?
Thug #1: You know, she stood up for herself on the bus? Wait, who was that? Not Martha Stewart?
Orange Line at Downtown Crossing
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: drunkbigirls
