Sex ed teacher: Now, before I start this class, all of you remember that my penis is bigger.
Australia
Overheard by: Not so sure…
Sex ed teacher: Now, before I start this class, all of you remember that my penis is bigger.
Australia
Overheard by: Not so sure…
Mom with two kids getting on escalator: Tommy, do you know what this is called? This is an escalator.
Tommy: Escalator.
Mom: Do you know what the opposite of “escalate” is?
(Tommy remains silent)
Mom: Elevate!
Airport
Atlanta, Georgia
Girl: Have you had glandular fever?
Guy: Yes, have you?
Girl: Yeah, the doctor gave me this cream to put on my mouth that was made from stuff that comes from uncircumcised dicks. I was like, “that doctor soooo didn't think I'd read the label.”
Melbourne
Australia
Guy on phone: What's wrong with taking a shower with the cat?
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Amy
Guy on cell: The trial's today… Um… No…for the last time mom was in jail.
16th Street
Denver, Colorado
Goth/punk chick smoking a cigarette: Oh shit, you know what I forgot?
Goth/punk guy: That you're killing your unborn baby?
Huron & First
Ann Arbor, Michigan
Overheard by: Melanie
Guy on phone: I'm going to titty fuck her on the casket.
Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: kOLT
Girl in red: I was telling my husband about you.
Guy in jeans: What were you telling him?
Girl in red: That you liked power bottoms.
Las Vegas, Nevada
Drunk old guy (supported by another): 61 years of celibacy!
Pirate's Alley
New Orleans, Louisiana
Overheard by: Sara
