Bottom Line: It Tastes Like Shit.

Guy: You!
Smoking, unsuspecting girl: Me? What'd I do?
Guy: Do you know how lonely it's been since you and Dave* quit smoking? Then everyone started to quit! And now you're smoking again?! At first it was all cute: “Awwww, Emily and Dave* are quitting together! They're like each other's rocks!” Then what happened?!
Smoking girl, sheepishly: We sunk.
Guy: And was it your idea for Dave to start rolling his own cigarettes?!
Smoking girl: Yes…
Guy, exasperated: Every time I ask him for a cigarette, it's like smoking a diaper!

New Jersey

Posted on October 13, 2009
Compare and contrast, Feelings, Girls, Guys, Health & Hygiene, New Jersey, Questions, Relationships, Smokers, Smoking

…Under “Skills”.

Blonde: I have this theory that babies who were born late are like always late to stuff. And babies who were born early, like premature, are always early.
Friend: Really?
Blonde: Yeah, it's like, on my resume.

Brisbane
Australia

Posted on October 9, 2009
Australia, Compare and contrast, Friends, Girls, Health & Hygiene, Pregnancy, Science

Only If You Leave Your Driver's License As Collateral

Goth guy to goth girlfriend: Can I borrow your blood?

Rochester
England

Overheard by: Bewildered Techie

Posted on October 5, 2009
Couples, England, Goths, Health & Hygiene, Offers and requests, Weirdness

What's More Natural Than Fondling a Relative's Artificial Breast?

Daughter in dressing room: Go ahead, feel them!
Mom in dressing room: No!
Daughter: Really, the point is to feel how natural they feel! I'm going to want to feel yours when you get them.

York, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Kendal

Posted on October 5, 2009
Family ties, Girls, Health & Hygiene, Moms, Parenting, Pennsylvania, Rack, Wishes

But When We Say That About Canadians, We Get Angry Letters

Girl #1: Hey, you smell great!
Girl #2: Really?
Girl #1: Yeah, you smell like that nice soap.
Girl #2: I don't use soap.

Toronto
Canadia

Overheard by: Justin

Posted on October 3, 2009
Canadia, Cleanliness, Compliments, Girls, Health & Hygiene, Sensory experiences

Well, It Was Just Rain.

Preppy girl #1: So I had it all over me, it was on my hands and my face…
Preppy girl #2: Oh my god! Did you throw up?

San Luis Obispo, California

Posted on September 29, 2009
Body parts, California, Cum, Hands, Health & Hygiene, Preppies, Questions, Sensory experiences, Weirdness

What– Too Soon?

Teenage daughter: I had some caffeine pretty late tonight, so I'm gonna take an extra 50 milligrams of Seroquel.
Mother: I'll be sure to call Mary-Kate if anything bad happens.

Highlands Ranch, Colorado