Guy on cell : Yeah, dude, I got her tickets to the Met! $15 seats, so we're way up there, but we're on the aisle too, so we won't get interfered with while we're going at it. (a few minutes later) So the loss of my virginity is imminent.
Jersey City Light Rail
New Jersey
Overheard by: twoferrets
Jersey girl #1: And then she was like, “What's a Guido?”
Jersey girl #2 (blissfully): I like to think there's a world where people don't know what Guidos are. I bet there'd be unicorns.
Manasquan, New Jersey
Black girl #1: It looks like you're wearing underwear.
Black girl #2: I am wearing underwear.
Black girl #1: Oh okay.
Black girl #2: Wanna see?
Black girls surrounding: No!
Jackson Memorial High School
Jackson, New Jersey
Asian chick: I'm going to meet my old boss at that Thai restaurant. You know, the one with the woman that feels me up.
Asian dude: Oh, yeah. Aren't all Thai women bisexual?
Jersey City, New Jersey
Overheard by: Shringle
Crazy lady, noticing long line: Is this the line to urinate? I can not believe this is the urination line. Unbelievable! I can't wait this long to urinate. There is no way. I have kidney problems. I need to urinate now. I don't wanna cut in line. I'll just go in the men's room. (as she enters men's room) I am a woman coming in here. I can not wait in a long line to urinate.
(a few minutes later, to women in line, while coming out) See! Your line hasn't even moved!
Hamilton Mall, New Jersey
Overheard by: last in line
20-something JAP to nerdy date: I love rushing. In my sorority, like, for every girl who rushes, the girls, like, have to discuss the girl's pros and cons, and like, for every con there has to be a pro, so like if you say, like, the girl is a total retard, you have to say something pro, like, she has opposable thumbs.
Nerdy date: When I was rushing they would give me a hot dog bun, but there was something in it that was not a hot dog.
20-something JAP: Oh that reminds me, like, I'll sleep at your house tonight, but like, it's just gonna be sleeping, not like, sex or anything, you know, because, like, I have to get to know a person a lot better than I, like, know you before I do something like that.
Nerdy date: Oh absolutely. I mean, when I mentioned sleeping over before, I just meant, you know, sleeping. I didn't mean anything more than that.
Sarah Silverman Concert
Atlantic City, New Jersey
Guy to brunette: Yo, tell your friend she's beautiful.
Brunette, about hot redhead: Oh, don't worry, she knows.
Grasshopper On The Green
New Jersey
(outside Abercrombie & Fitch)
Little boy, pointing at picture of shirtless male model: Look mommy, nipples!
Mother: Yes, honey, nipples. We aren't supposed to be looking at nipples.
Rockaway Townsquare Mall
Rockaway Township, New Jersey
Overheard by: We Aren't?
Woman: I think I have superpowers.
Lawrenceville, New Jersey
Overheard by: Anna
Guy to friend: No, man, I mean…she's not a *whore* whore, just a whore.
Outside City Bistro
Hoboken, New Jersey
Overheard by: Chris Maimone
