Nobody Ever Wins the Which-Sex's-Sex-Is-Best Argument

Straight girl: Butt sex, butt sex, butt sex!
Gay guy: You really love saying that, don't you?
Straight girl: Yes!
Gay professor: Do you prefer anal to vaginal!
Straight girl: Ewww, fuck no! I don't want anything in my asshole! See, I have a vagina. I have options, unlike gay men.
Gay professor: Ah, you'll never know the pleasures of prostate stimulation.

Westchester, New York

Posted on April 29, 2009
Ass, Backdoor, Compare and contrast, Default, Girls, Guys, New York, Queers, Questions, Students, Teachers, Vagina

Sweetie, I'm a Bottom.

Asian girl, holding out fist: Pound it?
Queer: Do I look like someone who pounds it?
Asian girl, giggling: Ummmm…

West Lafayette, Indiana

Overheard by: Kole

Posted on April 24, 2009
Asians, Default, Girls, Guys, Happiness, Indiana, Pop culture, Queers, Questions

I Just Wanted Permanent Safe Sex.

Flamboyant guy to another: There are just some things you can't laminate.

Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: Kate

Posted on March 26, 2009
Compare and contrast, Default, Guys, Pennsylvania, Queers, Weirdness, Words

In High School I Got So Depressed, I Dated Girls

Queer #1: You have so many ringtones!
Queer #2: Yeah, when I get depressed I buy ringtones. It's my thing!
Queer #1: When I get depressed I but chocolate and underwear.
Queer #2: Holla!
(they high five)

West Hollywood, California

Overheard by: Big Al

Posted on March 15, 2009
California, Candy, Cell phones, Clothes, Default, Feelings, Guys, Queers

I'll Have to If I Want to Be Prom Queen

High school boy: From now on, I'm going to do everything as homosexually as possible.

Bellingham, Washington

Posted on December 28, 2008
Default, Guys, Queers, Sexuality, Teens, Washington, Weirdness, Wishes

Turns Ordinary Clothes Into an Ensemble

Gay man on cell in big crowd: Where are you? I'm wearing a gray sweater, a black jacket, and a faggy scarf. A really faggy fag scarf.

Nuit Blanche
Toronto
Canadia

Posted on December 21, 2008
Canadia, Clothes, Default, On the phone, Queers, Questions, Sexuality, Words

But I'll Totally Buy the Kid Tap Shoes

Slightly effeminate black man on cell: Uh-uh, child. If you're pregnant, that ain't my child. You got to talk to my brother.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/411942930/he-said-to-talk-to-you.html

Overheard by: Ian

Posted on December 18, 2008
Black people, Compare and contrast, Default, Family ties, Offspring, On the phone, Overheard in Minneapolis, Pregnancy, Queers

…Rainy Days, and Men Who Aren't Afraid to Cuddle.

Girl in red: I was telling my husband about you.
Guy in jeans: What were you telling him?
Girl in red: That you liked power bottoms.

Las Vegas, Nevada

Posted on December 6, 2008
Backdoor, Default, Girls, Guys, Nevada, Queers, Questions, Relationships, Sexuality

But Leave Out the Part Where He Blew and Said “Haha, Fooled Ya!”

Gay man: So, did you end up fucking that guy from eHarmony?
Blondie: Sort of. When I was blowing him he told me to stop and I said, “No way, I'm just getting started!” And then he said, “Seriously, stop, I don't want to blow in your face.”
Gay man: That's like true love. You should use that story for your eHarmony commercial.

Central Illinois

Posted on November 9, 2008
BJs, Default, Feelings, Girls, Illinois, Internet, Queers, Questions, Sex

Not As Gross As Mickey Mouse Christmas Ornaments, Honey

Hallmark salesgirl: My stomach really hurts.
Queer: Does your face hurt too?
Hallmark salesgirl (long pause): Oh my god, gross!

McLean, Virginia

Posted on November 3, 2008
Default, Employees, Girls, Gripes, Insults, Maladies, Queers, Questions, Sensory experiences, Virginia

Queers