Relationships

Physics major #1: Well, I lost my credit and debit cards, so I had to call and cancel them.
Physics major #2: Oh yeah, those girls who took off your pants, right?

McGill University
Canadia

Girl #1: So what are we looking for here?
Girl #2, distractedly: A birthday card for my boyfriend Tom*. (pauses) I mean…
Girl #1: Oh my god, you totally just called your best friend your boyfriend! If that's not a huge Freudian slip, I don't know what is.
Girl #2: Freud can suck my dick!

Culpeper, Virginia

Overheard by: freudian follower

[Three intoxicated college girls are walking along the street. One trips, falls, and all three laugh hysterically. An unmarked police van passes by]Cop, yelling out of the window: Looks like three underage drinking tickets right there!
Girl #1: We’re all 21!
Cop: Well, it looks like you’re 4!
Girl #2: Looks like you’re 37 and looking for a boyfriend!

Madison, Wisconsin

Mother: Why do people like you?
Teen daughter: What?!
Mother: I mean, why do people like to talk to you and be your friend? I just don’t get it.

Fairfax, California

Girl #1: So what do you think of her boyfriend?
Girl #2: I can see his underwear through his pants.

Tapas Teatro
Baltimore, Maryland

Overheard by: Underwear Moderator

Guy #1: I was the second person she ever had sex with.
Guy #2: What!?
Guy #1: I know! And it freaked me out! So I never called her again!

Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Big B

50-something guy #1: My new girlfriend is twenty years younger than me.
50-something guy #2: You going to marry her?
50-something guy #1: No. I had that talk with her at the very beginning.
50-something guy #2: You got any nude photos of her on your phone?

Health Club Locker Room
Shawnee Mission, Kansas

Lady #1: Oooh… These cups are so cute!
Lady #2: Did you notice they have them set out on the drive-through window? Very smart. All the husbands who forgot to buy presents for their wives will be bringing home Starbucks mugs today.
Lady #1: After 21 years of marriage, I buy my own gifts.

http://www.overheardinvancouver.ca/

Overheard by: erin

Girl #1, in lunch line: What’s wrong with him?
Girl #2: I mean, he seems like a really nice guy… And I’m not into nice guys.

Yale University
New Haven, Connecticut

Geek: A pity hug is still a hug, and a pity girlfriend still has boobs!

University of Idaho
Idaho

Overheard by: Rebecca