Flamboyant gay guy #1, whispering discretely: I'm going to do you so hard when we get home.
Flamboyant gay guy #2, not whispering: I'm going to shit in your mouth.
Sydney
Australia
Overheard by: MB
Flamboyant gay guy #1, whispering discretely: I'm going to do you so hard when we get home.
Flamboyant gay guy #2, not whispering: I'm going to shit in your mouth.
Sydney
Australia
Overheard by: MB
Band geek, eating lunch, to friends: I've come to the realization that if I were a woman, I'd have amazing breasts.
Rutgers University
Camden, New Jersey
Overheard by: One time at band camp…
Woman walking out of men's barber shop to friend: I can't believe they wouldn't cut my hair. I'm a lesbian! That makes me a man.
Brisbane
Australia
Teacher: So, for the final sentence we should get some sort of metaphor for tax cuts helping the US recession.
Student #1: Hmm… Hey, you know like, the commercial where they put gum in the hole in the dam to stop the leak?.
Student #2: Or the finger!
Teacher: Oh, you mean in the dyke!
Student #1: Yeah, so… Tax cuts would be the finger in the hole of America’s dyke?
Teacher: Maybe we shouldn’t use a metaphor.
English Essentials Class
Waimea, Hawaii
Overheard by: boehmface
Middle-aged shopper: There’s something so disconcerting about being poked in the tits by a kitchen fork.
Edmonton
Alberta
Canadia
Overheard by: disgruntled shopgirl
Tomboy: We need to get boyfriends so people will stop thinking we’re gay.
Russian girl: Why do people think we’re gay?
Tomboy: ‘Cause everyone we hang out with is gay!
Ludlow Avenue
Cincinnati, Ohio
Overheard by: The gay girl standing with them
50-something Southern belle: We got married last year and he refused to leave for the honeymoon until he went gator hunting. We didn't consummate for three days!
South Carolina
Gay boy: … And I woke up and my room was filled with red buttons and ears of corn, then my comforter turned into a giant lake, and three purple rhinoceroses just like rose out of it! And–
Girlfriend #1: No, Christian, there is no such thing as rhinoceroses. The plural of “rhinoceros” is “rhinocerii”.
Girlfriend #2: Stacy… I don’t think that’s right… I think it may be “rhinos-“
Girlfriend #1: Courtney, that’s ridiculous, we’re being serious here…
Gay boy: Okay, guys! It doesn’t matter. Anyway, back to the story… The weirdest part is, after all that happened, I thought I liked girls…
Girlfriend #1 and girlfriend #2: Wow… That is strange…
Huntington Movie Theater
Long Island, New York
Overheard by: Mo
