The Goal Is to Prevent That, Not Hasten It

Son, in dog food aisle: Why don't we buy this one?
Mom: Because he won't eat it.
Son: But it's cheaper!
Mom: And therefore not good for him.
Son: I don't see what the problem is, he'll be dead soon.

Tesco Supermarket
England

Posted on February 27, 2010
Animals, Death & dying, England, Food, Moms, Shopping, Should have used a condom

We Were Only Growing You for the Organs, Anyway

Dad: Buddy, you have to breathe. You can't hold your breath forever.
Son: No! I'm never going to breathe again. I hate it!
Dad: Sounds good.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/368530938/thats-one-way-to-solve-it.html

Overheard by: kaybay

Posted on January 9, 2010
Dads, Family, Gripes, Health & Hygiene, Kids, Overheard in Minneapolis, Parenting, Should have used a condom, Stupidity

Gin?

Middle-aged father to waitress, about loud toddler daughter: It's an emergency. We need some happy juice.

Restaurant
Denver, Colorado

Overheard by: silver

Posted on January 8, 2010
Baristas, Colorado, Dads, Food, Kids, Offers and requests, Parenting, Restaurants, Should have used a condom

…With a Real Girl.

Six-year-old boy, firmly groping mannequin's backside: I'm popular! I'm popular! Look, mommy!
Flustered mom: Go be popular over there!

Morganton, North Carolina

Overheard by: Carla

Posted on December 22, 2009
Kids, Moms, North Carolina, Parenting, Should have used a condom

Clustered Around the Mayonnaise and Wonder Bread

Aunt: Jared*, put the toy back. We are going to go over to K-Mart, because they have a better selection.
Four-year-old: I don't want to go to K-Mart, auntie! There's too many white people over there!

Ocean City, Maryland

Overheard by: His (embarassed) Mother

Posted on December 13, 2009
Family, Kids, Maryland, Race, Shopping, Should have used a condom, Stupidity, Toys, Wishes

I Thought You Didn't Want To?

Mom to toddler girl: What fish should we get today? Salmon or tilapia or flounder?
Toddler girl: Is that “flounder” like in Little Mermaid?
Mom: Well, it's a fish, like flounder was.
Toddler girl: I want to eat flounder! Let's cook him. Mommy, can we eat Nemo too?

Costco
Fairfax, Virginia

Posted on September 12, 2009
Animals, Food, Kids, Moms, Movies, Parenting, Questions, Should have used a condom, Virginia, Wishes, Words

Portrait Of the Scat Fetishist As a Young Man

Little boy, gleefully wiping chocolate on his father's white pants: I'm wiping your butt! Haha! I'm wiping your butt!

Ann Arbor, Michigan

Posted on September 6, 2009
Ass, Candy, Cleanliness, Dads, Kids, Michigan, Parenting, Should have used a condom

Parenting, Encapsulated.

Little boy: Mommy, come here! I have a present for you!
(mom comes over, little boy proceeds to dump a bucket of water over her head).
Little boy: Did you like it?
Mom: No.
(little boy dumps another bucket of water on her head)

Neighborhood Pool
New Jersey

Overheard by: CMac