Weirdness

Guy #1: I once tried to hit on a chick while I was drunk and throwing up, but now that's just a fun story I tell and nobody lost their respect for me.
Guy #2: Except for the girl you were hitting on.
Guy #1: Well, I don't know. Her nickname was “dicktooth.”

Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Claire

Teenage girl to friends: The groin is the eye, no?
Teen friend: The eyes are the groin of the face!
First teen: Right!

Ferry
Larkspur, California

Overheard by: I Know, I know

Peasant husband in bookshop, holding up book: Hey, look at this!
Peasant wife: That's the problem with books, they make you do things.

Leamington Spa
England

Overheard by: Bleep

Nine-year-old: Logan almost got a girlfriend!
Six-year-old: Really?
Nine-year-old: Yep. Remember Courtney?
Six-year-old: With the glasses?
Nine-year-old: Yeah. He asked her out on the bus, but she said no. After that, Joe was like, “I want a girlfriend,” and I was like, “yeah, I know. Me, too, buddy. Me, too.”

Swimming Pool
Louisiana

Girl: Well, the sad thing is I'm gonna have to treat you like Morgan when she doesn't want to take her ear infection pills.

Smith College
Northampton, Massachusetts

Acting professor: We just tweaked a few things to make it Christmassy and kidnapped Santa.

Point Park University
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: ZB

Girl on cell: His thing…it was like a big lamb sandwich!

http://overheardinpdx.blogspot.com/2008/07/we-call-it-beastilicious.html

Overheard by: aaron

Girl #1 on Facebook: And then I gave my mom a lap dance.
Girl #2, looking at pictures: It looks like she was enjoying it.

UMass
Dartmouth, Massachusetts

Guy passing pet store: I need a Labrador. Let's get one.
Girlfriend: What did you do with your old one?
Guy: I don't think you want to know.

Melbourne
Australia

Overheard by: XPIOTOS

Professor: And you thought I was some geeky wanker, going on about agriculture!

Eastern Michigan University