Why I Could Never Teach Middle School

13-year-old preppy white girl: It be sneakah time, ya'll!

Deptford Mall
Deptford, New Jersey

Posted on August 31, 2009
Kids, Language barrier, Malls, New Jersey, Preppies, Stupidity, Teens, Whiteys

That's Your Shadow, Britney.

Translucently pale white girl staring at cop car, to equally pale friend: My god, we've turned into black people!

Aurora, Colorado

Overheard by: Lee

Posted on July 23, 2009
Colorado, Friends, Girls, Race, Stupidity, Whiteys

Just a Bit Self-Conscious About His Baby-Carrot Penis

Blonde: So this guy was hitting on me and he was like, “so, do you have a boyfriend?” and I was like, “ummm, yeah.” It was really creepy. I was like, “oh my god, I can not tell my boyfriend about this!” I mean, normally he wouldn't really care, but (looks around and lowers voice) this guy was black, so I think my boyfriend might flip. I mean, not that he's racist or anything.

Penn Tech
Williamsport, Pennsylvania

Posted on June 30, 2009
Bimbettes, Pennsylvania, Race, Relationships, Weirdness, Whiteys

Every Now and Then, My Inner Cracker Pops Up and Says Stupid Shit

Black girl in car: God, I wish I was black so I could say things like that.
White girl in car: But wait…you are black.
Black girl in car: I can't believe I just said that!

Detroit, Michigan

Posted on June 13, 2009
Black people, Default, Girls, Guys, Michigan, Race, Religion, Weather, Whiteys, Wishes

As Friends

White guy: So, is it true that when you die you go to heaven and get forty virgins to do whatever with?
Muslim guy: No, that's wrong. It's heaven: you get as many virgins as you want.

Liberty High School
Colorado Springs, Colorado

Posted on October 7, 2008
Colorado, Compare and contrast, Guys, Questions, Religion, Religious fanatics, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Sexuality, Whiteys

She Took Music Class at Montessori School

Very white mom: “The wheels on the bus go round and round, round and round…” Sing with me, honey.
Very white four-year old daughter: “Rollin' down the street smokin'…”

Walt Disney World
Orlando, Florida

Posted on September 14, 2008
Compare and contrast, Default, Florida, Girls, Kids, Moms, Music, Singing, Tourist attractions, Whiteys

But He Just Unchained Me from the Stove, So I’m Trying Not to Press My Luck

Mitt Romney volunteer: So basically I asked my husband if we could please try not to have a baby this year.

Mackinac Island, Michigan

Overheard by: Glad I Chose Fred Thompson

Posted on April 18, 2008
Christianity, Michigan, Offers and requests, Offspring, Pregnancy, Religious fanatics, Sexuality, Whiteys, Wishes, Women

Once a Month. Our People Love Dragons and Firecrackers

White girl to Asian guy: So… How often is Chinese New Year?

http://overheardinumcp.blogspot.com

Overheard by: tom

Posted on March 9, 2008
Colleges & Universities, Default, Girls, Idiots, Maryland, Overheard in College Park, Questions, Students, Stupidity, Time Management, Whiteys

Plus, You Get to Have Boobs

Asian girl: Well, I don’t know what it’s like being white.
White girl: You feel guilty all the time.
White guy: Yeah, for things you never did.
Asian girl: Awesome!

Centennial College
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: Meech

Posted on February 12, 2008
Asians, Canadia, Race, Whiteys

There Are Black People in Wisconsin?

Black party hostess: So, are there any black people in Nevada?
Drunk white hippie girl from Nevada: No! But we might as well be black, because we’re so uneducated and everything, you know? [Room, full of black professionals, explodes with laughter.]Black suit: I need a very dry martini right now.

Gregory Street
Madison, Wisconsin

Posted on November 8, 2007
Black people, Race, Whiteys, Wisconsin

Whiteys