Drunk bus rider #1: Damn, this bus is always so slow!
Drunk bus rider #2: I swear, if I was a wizard, I would turn this bus into a rabbit… But that's fantasy stuff, and I'm not that into fantasy.
Seattle, Washington
Drunk bus rider #1: Damn, this bus is always so slow!
Drunk bus rider #2: I swear, if I was a wizard, I would turn this bus into a rabbit… But that's fantasy stuff, and I'm not that into fantasy.
Seattle, Washington
American tourist to girlfriend: No, it's a special species of blue rabbit that can survive in space.
Girlfriend: Wow!
Kaaba Cafe
Prague
Czech Republic
Teenage tourist girl to friend: Wanna play connect the dots with my track marks?
Friend: (laughs nervously)
Teenage tourist girl: Also, if you do that stupid thing with your water glass again, I'm gonna strangle you, and throw you in a pit and put a dead dog on top of your grave. Pass me that cheese?
Pizzeria
Rome
Italy
Customs officer to woman with a cat: Can you prove that this cat is Canadian?
Canadian Customs
Pearson Airport, Toronto
Canadia
Older woman with no inside voice, inside a bus on rush hour: I want a diamond about as big as a horse turd.
http://www.overheardinminneapolis.com/2007/08/it_will_be_a_marriage_built_on.html
Overheard by: bleep
Tattooed girl: I don't wrestle live dogs anymore. Now I wrestle humans.
Springfield, Missouri
Overheard by: Summer
College therapist to class: Now take deep, slow breaths. We don't want stress to take over, because stress means purple elephants.
Marquette, Michigan
Emo guy on cell: I've got to get on the electric snake now. I'll go wherever it takes me. (pause) Tell your mom not to lose an eye, ok?
B Line
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Smallison
Girl #1: Are you still going out with that guy you were with back in April?
Girl #2: (blank stare)
Girl #1: The one you were living with?
Girl #2: (blank stare)
Girl #1: The one with the dog?
Girl #2: (blank stare)
Girl #1: Little black dog?
Girl #2: Oh, Jack! Yeah, we're still together.
Bus
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Zoe
Babysitter: My dog gets hot walking.
Seven-year-old: How can you tell?
Babysitter: He sticks his tongue out, and his fur is really warm.
Seven-year-old: Sometimes when I'm out in the sun my hair feels hot.
Babysitter: Yeah, now imagine you have hair all over your body.
Seven-year-old: Like my dad.
St. Louis, Missouri
