Colleges & Universities

Drunk girl: Tunisia is a place in Africa. They have lots of problems in Africa… And I’m going to fix them! [Falls down.]

Mount Holyoke College
South Hadley, Massachusetts

Poetry girl: I've been so depressed all weekend.
Poetry guy: Well, why have you been so depressed?
Poetry girl: I wrote this poem about divorce, so I was thinking about divorce all weekend, and it just made me so depressed.
(long pause)
Poetry girl, loudly: Can you tell me about the human condition? I mean, can you really tell me about the human condition?

George Mason University
Fairfax County, Virginia

Overheard by: The Bu

American Government professor: And our second candidate for class president was born to a military family in 1990, which almost makes me sick to my stomach when I think about what I was doing in 1990. See, you could be my baby!

Auburn University
Auburn, Alabama

Engineer #1: We’re playing my little ponies?!
Engineer #2: Oh, god.
Engineer #1: Dude, we’re gonna fucking kill them! [Laughs maniacally].

Northwestern University
Evanston, Illinois

Ditzy college girl, interrupting class: Do you live in Penn Yan?
Professor: No, I live on Bluff Point.
Ditzy college girl: Oh… Did you know that Sarassin's delivers?
Professor: No, I didn't, but do you mind if I get back to my lecture?

Keuka College
New York

Overheard by: Rachel Bz.

Older woman: My first computer was a Commodore 64!
Younger woman: A what? That sounds like a sex toy.

Western Michigan University
Kalamazoo, Michigan

Med student #1: You broke up with her because of a facial expression?
Med student #2: Man, if you saw her “o” face you'd would've done the same. (makes contorted face with mouth wide open)
Med student #1: Oh, hell yeah… that's some ugly shit to come to.
Med student #2: I would have never been able to get off… and all those sounds!
Med student #1: Sexy?
Med student #2: Jungle. Primal.

School of Medicine
University of Maryland

Overheard by: Mykl

College boy #1: If I were a T-Rex I would fuck shit up.
College boy #2: Yeah, but good luck masturbating.

Hendrix College
Arkansas

Overheard by: College Girl Walking By

Guy on cell: Yeah, well, that sucks that you don't have any friends, but now at least it's legal for you to drink your troubles away!

University of Delaware
Newark, Delaware

Overheard by: Anne

Male student to another, seriously: So you just came in your pants?

Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute
Troy, New York