Math professor: In Russia, if something is not allowed and you want it really bad, you can do it.
Brown University
Providence, Rhode Island
Math professor: In Russia, if something is not allowed and you want it really bad, you can do it.
Brown University
Providence, Rhode Island
Girl to friend: Sometimes she comes back from a party, and she's like, “Laura and I totally double-teamed this guy last night!” And I'm like, “That is just so wrong.”
Hamilton College
Clinton, New York
Professor: Does this fit into his expanding and contracting magical porn circle?
Washington University
St Louis, Missouri
Overheard by: You can't laugh in a four person class
Teen guy #1: Who comes to a concert to make out?
Teen guy #2: Uh, anyone with a significant other.
Teen guy #1: If a girl will make out with you at a concert, then she's down for anything. Like she'd totally take it up the butt.
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: not so much
Teen girl: I hate you.
Teen guy: You hate me? Nice. Real mature… (pause) Oh my god! An Elmo lunchbox!
Officeworks
Bendigo
Australia
Overheard by: ColdSpiral
(little girl follows older sister into the bathroom)
Older sister: Sarah, do not come in here with me! I'm on the phone!
Sarah: But I have to go to the bathroom! Besides, you're just talking to your boyfriend.
Older sister: Sarah, I mean it! Go up to the room.
Sarah: You know daddy doesn't let me go in the elevator by myself.
Older sister: Just do it, he's not going to know.
Sarah: But someone could take me!
Older sister: Yeah right, who would want you?
Sarah: The Vice President of the United States!
Marriot Hotel
Teaneck, New Jersey
Very white mom: “The wheels on the bus go round and round, round and round…” Sing with me, honey.
Very white four-year old daughter: “Rollin' down the street smokin'…”
Walt Disney World
Orlando, Florida
Man in mall: Excuse me, where can I hail a taxi?
Mall employee: This is Vermont, dude.
Man in mall: There has to be taxis. There are roads, aren't they?
Mall employee: Nope, no taxis. But lots of guns.
Rutland, Vermont
Overheard by: MeggerzDotCom
Stoner chick: I really wish I could bite something and for once, not have to worry about it disappearing.
Bakersfield, California
Overheard by: don't we all?
English teacher: Yeah, I dated this girl one time and she took a class and learned middle English. She memorized the beginning of The Canterbury Tales in middle English so she was like, “Do you want to hear The Canterbury Tales in middle English?” And I was like “yeah!” and she said it, and it didn't even sound like English. It was crazy, like chanting or something. I was about to propose to her just then. But I got over it.
Rock Bridge High School
Columbia, Missouri
Overheard by: Kelsey
