Pretentious female student: I heard that in Thailand it's illegal to even mention the musical The King and I, because it was so offensive.
Unimpressed teacher: Really… I would've banned it because it's stupid.
Albuquerque, New Mexico
Overheard by: Clemmentine
Literature professor explaining “queer studies”: Heterosexuality is just not sexy enough to be an academic topic.
University of Oslo
Norway
Overheard by: agrees
Girl to friend: My pussy's like a rain forest–dark, moist and full of mystery.
The Earl
Atlanta, Georgia
Vendor: Buy some water! I’ll teach you how to dance!
Pitchfork Music Festival
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Seraphina
Woman on phone: Okay, so go past the monkey and we'll be right here!
Harrison, Michigan
Security guard to woman who just drove over the curb: Are you drunk?
Woman driver: No, she (points to passenger) was distracting me with my vibrator!
Hospital Parking Lot
Denver, Colorado
Cadet before army-navy march-on: It smells like butt over here!
Security: You're in Philadelphia.
Eagles Stadium
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Appok
Suit on cell: I just landed in Maine. I mean San Diego. What am I thinking?
Airport
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: weary traveler
Lecturer: I don't know, a horny Frenchman made this up.
Chemistry Lecture
University of Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: laura
Loud girl: Would you rather have cheese or oral sex?
Amherst, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Emily
