Freshman ho #1: But… Are you, like, good at drunk driving?
Freshman ho #2: Oh, yeah… I’m, like, sooo good! I’ve been drunk driving, like, since I got my license.
http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com/2007/04/april-is-cruelest-month.html
Overheard by: newm
Little old lady: I’m not a Pina Colada type. Give me a Coors Light and a nice doobie and I’m good.
Women’s Gym
Studio City, California
Overheard by: urzzz
Drunk freshman: I love it here! Look, even the street sparkles!
Passing upperclassman: That’s broken glass.
Richmond, Virginia
Girl on bus: I've been trying to quit drinking and she was all like, “have some juice with me!” And then she pulls out a half gallon of vodka, and I'm all, “bitch, what you doing?”
Seattle, Washington
Tall gay 20-something male on cell: My niece died. I need a Fresca.
CVS
Boston, Massachusetts
Tough, burly, tattooed mom: C'mon, honey, you'll like it!
Tearful four-year-old boy: I don't wanna!
Tough, burly, tattooed mom: Everyone loves the beer store! (pulls boy into beer kiosk)
Collingswood Auction
Farmingdale, New Jersey
Overheard by: not EVERYONE
Guy #1, gesturing: …in a martini glass.
Guy #2: That's disgusting! Why did you do that?
Guy #1: Because he had a broken jaw.
Guy #2: I know, but why were you doing that? Community service?
Bus Stop
San Diego, California
Underage girl, at 6 pm: Man, I knew I should've started drinking at 2!
Glengarry Highland Games
Canadia
Overheard by: is it that boring?
Drunk guy: Everyone in this room should get hair extensions.
Toronto
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Meech
Guy #1: So, where can we get another guy like Brian to drink a lot of water?
Guy #2: Well, Phyllis is out of work.
Guy #1: Who's Phyllis?
Guy #2: She's this really good PR girl. Like a rotten tomato.
Massachusetts
Overheard by: Sunny
