We Have Merit Badges in Blasphemy and Obscenity

Woman, crossing in front of two Scouts: Shit! Oh, I'm sorry!
Scout to another: We could top that.

Slatersville, Rhode Island

Overheard by: Ben Jam'in

Posted on November 11, 2008
Default, Etiquette, Insults, Rhode Island, Women, Words

In This Case, Even Dad Would Agree

(outside Abercrombie & Fitch)
Little boy, pointing at picture of shirtless male model: Look mommy, nipples!
Mother: Yes, honey, nipples. We aren't supposed to be looking at nipples.

Rockaway Townsquare Mall
Rockaway Township, New Jersey

Overheard by: We Aren't?

Posted on November 7, 2008
Default, Etiquette, Kids, Malls, Moms, New Jersey, Nipples

Kid's Got a Point

Two-year-old girl: Fuck that. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Fuck!

Orthodontist
Gilbert, Arizona

Overheard by: KBizz

Posted on October 17, 2008
Arizona, Default, Doctor's office, Etiquette, Feelings, Girls, Insults, Kids

Or Sam's Club, the All-S&M Warehouse

Girlfriend, after guy has smacked her butt: This isn't Wal-Mart!

Target
Salem, Oregon

Posted on October 8, 2008
Compare and contrast, Default, Etiquette, Girls, Oregon, Stores

I'll Tell the World!

Guy: Dude, his nipples are like as big as my pecs!
Girl: …people can hear you here.

Stamp Student Union
University of Maryland

Posted on September 17, 2008
Body parts, Colleges & Universities, Compare and contrast, Default, Etiquette, Girls, Maryland, Nipples

People With No Boundaries Aren't Quite Sure When They're Having Sex

Girl in stall (yelling on cell): Oh, my god. Do you really have herpes? That's contagious, right? Should I get tested?
(flush of toilet)
Friend's voice on speakerphone: Am I on speakerphone in the bathroom?
Girl in stall: Yeah, I'm just peeing. So should I get tested?
Friend: I'm not talking about this on speakerphone.
Girl in stall: Okay, it's off… Oh, so you can only get herpes through sex?

Public Bathroom
Kent State University, Ohio

Overheard by: Laureen

Posted on September 9, 2008
Colleges & Universities, Default, Etiquette, Friends, Girls, Ohio, On the phone, Pee, Questions, Restroom, Sexuality, STDs

God: La La La La La–Can't Hear You!

(guy grabs girl's hand and licks cotton candy off her finger and licks finger)
Girl: Be careful, you don't where these fingers have been.
Guy: Well, I know last night they were in your vagina.
Girl: Shhh! People can hear you!
Guy: No one's even listening to us!

San Diego, California

Posted on September 4, 2008
Advice, California, Default, Etiquette, Girls, Guys, Masturbation, Sexuality, Vagina

You're Always Telling Me I Should Have Goals

Little boy (loudly): I want to eat poop.
Mom (who clearly wasn't paying attention): What, honey?
Little boy: I would like to eat poop.

Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: JessH.

Posted on August 27, 2008
Default, Etiquette, Kids, Massachusetts, Moms, Poop, Weirdness, Wishes

We Don't Make These Up

Annoying daughter: Ewww, don't order broccoli pizza. That's gross!
White trash mom: Smell my armpit.
Annoying daughter: Okay!
White trash mom: Here, smell this one too.

Roma Pizza
Ocean City, New Jersey

Overheard by: grossed out

Posted on August 13, 2008
Default, Etiquette, Food, Gripes, Kids, Moms, New Jersey, Offers and requests, Restaurants

But Odds Are You Still Aren't Paying Attention

Flight attendant, concluding pre-flight safety spiel: For those of you who paid attention: Thank you. And for those of you who did not: Good luck.

International Airport
Honolulu, Hawaii

Overheard by: Eric Dean

Posted on August 1, 2008
Airports & flights, Compare and contrast, Default, Etiquette, Euphemisms, Hawaii, Public transportation

Etiquette