Use “Infinite” As a Noun. I Dare You.

Preppy girl #1, working on chemistry assignment: So, say you have a finite amount of this chemical.
Preppy girl #2: Wait, “finite” means there's no limit.
Preppy girl #1: No, that's “infinite.”
Preppy girl #2: “Finite” and “infinite” are the same thing. “Finite” is the adjective form of “infinite.”

Suzalo Library, University of Washington
Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: Scared for America's future

Posted on May 3, 2009
Colleges & Universities, Default, Education, Girls, Students, Stupidity, Teens, Washington, Words

Have You Considered Sarah Lawrence?

Girl #1: Let me suggest to you…
Girl #2 (interrupting): Why can't I take like drugs or sex? Something that interests me? Not like race… Not that it isn't that interesting… Not that I'm racist. I'm not a racist. (nervous laugh)

Long Island University, New York

Overheard by: Reena

Posted on May 2, 2009
Advice, Colleges & Universities, Default, Drugs, Girls, New York, Questions, Race, Sex

Tell Me You Didn't Get It Just to Use That Line?

Girl: Yeah, my husband's in Iraq. And I just got a boob job! How do you like my rack?

High School Reunion
Michigan

Posted on May 2, 2009
Body parts, Default, Geography, Girls, Michigan, Questions, Relationships, School [Elem., Middle, & High]

Cut To The Chase. Will There Be Girl On Girl Strap on Action?

Lesbian: They think that just because I like girls, I think with my penis. It's rubber!

Sydney
Australia

Posted on May 2, 2009
Australia, Compare and contrast, Default, Girls, Lesbos, Penis, Sexuality

The Big Ones Are Making My Tummy Ache

Cute little girl: Daddy, can we eat a little pigeon?

São Paulo
Brazil

Posted on May 1, 2009
Birds, Brazil, Default, Family ties, Girls, Kids, Questions

As Seen in Two Girls, One Cut

Male suit: Did you know that the most common cosmetic surgery these days is vaginal rejuvenation?
Female suit: “Vaginal rejuvenation,” that's a mouthful.

Starbucks
New York

Overheard by: Caged Monkey

Posted on May 1, 2009
Default, Girls, Guys, New York, Questions, Restaurants, Suits, Vagina, Words

Or Why We Have Matching Engagement Rings

Male tour guide: So, this building is wh…
Sorostitute: Oh my god! Mike! (hugs tour guide)
Male tour guide: Hi…how are you?
Sorostitute: I'm great, but I gotta run, call me!
Mom in tour: I thought you said your name was Josh!
Male tour guide: It is…I don't know who that was.

Eastern Michigan University

Posted on April 30, 2009
Colleges & Universities, Default, Employees, Girls, Guys, Michigan, Names, Offers and requests, Questions, Sorority types, Weirdness

Does That Pole Make Me Look Fat?

Girl in stall: Hi, can you put mom on the phone? (pause) Hey mom, yeah, it's me…next time you're online, go to my Facebook page and check out the pictures of me at the strip club.

Ladies Restroom, Library
Mississippi

Posted on April 29, 2009
Default, Family ties, Girls, Internet, Mississippi, Offers and requests, Restroom

Nobody Ever Wins the Which-Sex's-Sex-Is-Best Argument

Straight girl: Butt sex, butt sex, butt sex!
Gay guy: You really love saying that, don't you?
Straight girl: Yes!
Gay professor: Do you prefer anal to vaginal!
Straight girl: Ewww, fuck no! I don't want anything in my asshole! See, I have a vagina. I have options, unlike gay men.
Gay professor: Ah, you'll never know the pleasures of prostate stimulation.

Westchester, New York

Posted on April 29, 2009
Ass, Backdoor, Compare and contrast, Default, Girls, Guys, New York, Queers, Questions, Students, Teachers, Vagina

…Like It Says in Our Biology Textbook?

Teen girl, looking confused: Wait, guys. (pause) Do black people see in different colors?

Bus
Seattle, Washington

Posted on April 28, 2009
Bus, Default, Girls, Offers and requests, Questions, Race, Stupidity, Teens, Washington