Man to wife in purse section: That doesn't look like a travel bag! Stay focused!
Nordstrom
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: Kim
Man to wife in purse section: That doesn't look like a travel bag! Stay focused!
Nordstrom
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: Kim
Guy with clipboard: Do you have a minute for human rights?
Guy walking by: No. (pause) Wait, did you say humans rights?
Guy with clipboard: Yes.
Guy walking by: Oh, I thought you were one of those crazy environmentalist people.
Guy with clipboard: No, we're crazy gay rights people.
University of Colorado, Boulder
Overheard by: Violentvixen
Mom in bathroom stall: Okay Michael, come on, you have to pee.
Son: Mom, I don't wanna play games with you!
Mom: What is wrong with you? At least put your clothes back on if you're not going to pee!
Tempe, Arizona
Mom, walking in the rain: This is not good.
Four-year-old son: It’s nice!
Mom: It is not nice, what the hell?!
Springfield, Massachusetts
Lady, bumping into man: What? You're so in a rush you have to knock me down?!
Man: Sorry, I was gonna ask you the same thing.
Lady: Watch where you're going!
Man: Please leave me alone!
Lady: No! You leave me alone!
Metro
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Jim
Man to himself: I will never be able to satisfy a woman because my penis is mounted to low on my body. Damn German genes!
Dallas, Texas
Boy: I should be a rent-a-cop.
Girl #1, laughing: You'd be the least believable rent-a-cop ever.
Girl #2: Yeah, they might mistake you for a gay stripper.
Tempe, Arizona
Guy to friend: What you should've said was, “Ya know, I don't laugh at you when you can't get your dick hard!”
Decatur, Georgia
Bartender: The answer was “The North Sea.” We did not accept “Nordic” or “Norse.”
Guy: But my hand has a lisp!
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