Kids

Child, as his dad videotapes a monkey: I can’t see the monkey!
Dad: You’ll see him when we get home.

Vilas Park Zoo
Madison, Wisconsin

Overheard by: mike

10-year-old boy to Scrabble players: You guys are playing Scrabble? That’s totally pimpin’!

Comic book store
Towson, Maryland

Man: You're going to need to empty your bladder.
Little girl (in squeaky high voice): I don't wanna empty my bladder!
Man (unashamedly loud): You'll need to empty your bladder before you get on the plane!
Little girl: Not fair!

St. Paul Airport
Minneapolis

Young woman to small boy, loudly: Get your hands outta your pants, dude! (moments later) I said, scratch it through them!

Bus Stop
Portland, Oregon

Overheard by: across the street

Kid: Mom… Mom… Mom! You're ignoring me again!
Mom: Yeah, I know. I've sort of learned to tune you out.

Bellingham, Washington

Girl #1: Oh my god! At work today, the kids had to write stories and they are the worst writers ever! One kid had an entire paragraph with no periods, and a bunch of them were capitalizing days of the week and stuff. It was awful.
Girl #2: You're supposed to capitalize days of the week.
Girl #1, in embarrassed awe: No! You're kidding, right? I told them they weren't supposed to…

http://overheardinpdx.blogspot.com/2008/10/thursdays-child-has-far-to-go.html

Overheard by: lauren

Six-year-old: Piss piss pissy piss piss.
Unconcerned mother: Oh, look here’s the Crayola aisle!

Michael’s
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

Emphatic girl: Babies can't watch porn!

Smith College
Northampton, Massachusetts

Overheard by: TARDIS Dyke

Emo kid carrying a toaster with two slices of bread: Everyone's looking at our toaster.

Glenfield Mall
Auckland
New Zealand

Overheard by: Kelly

Dad: Does Gracie love momma?
Toddler: Pshnoooooo.
Dad: Does Gracie love Elmo?
Toddler: Yeah!

Target
Nashville, Tennessee