Drunk girl, very concerned: He's totally going to get fucked in the A! And he has scoliosis, so he's always bent over, so he's definitely going to get fucked in the A!
Macalester College
St. Paul, Minnesota
Drunk girl, very concerned: He's totally going to get fucked in the A! And he has scoliosis, so he's always bent over, so he's definitely going to get fucked in the A!
Macalester College
St. Paul, Minnesota
Freshman boy: I think I have gingivitis.
Friend: You can't get gingivitis on your hand!
High School
Amherst, Massachusetts
Overheard by: shiny
Girl, walking barefoot under the rain: Oh, the joys of Richmond. We are so gonna get hepatitis.
Bag lady: No! Don't do that, but if you do… give me some!
Richmond, Virginia
Overheard by: singing in the rain
Middle-aged man on bus: I made the mistake of letting my grandkids come over Saturday. They are nothing but little virus factories!
http://overheardinpdx.blogspot.com/2007/08/offspring.html
Overheard by: micah
Finnish lady: They waited years to diagnose him so now of course he's got a lot of luggage.
American lady: Wait, don't you mean baggage?
Finnish lady: Luggage?
American lady: Baggage.
Finnish lady: Baggage, luggage.
Brazilian man, totally bewildered: Suitcases?
West Hollywood, California
Overheard by: Sprightly
Girl #1: I haven't kissed him in over a week because he has mono. But a couple days ago we went out to Subway, and then to my house to eat it and watch a movie. Well, he went home and I saw what I thought was my Subway cup, so I took a big swig out of it.
Girl #2: Oh, no!
Girl #1: Yeah, and I said “screw it!” and I just decided to make out with him, since I missed it so much. But I've been feeling a little crappy lately.
Girl #2: (stares)
Girl #1, thoughtfully: I hope I'm not getting sick. (pause) Oh, this shirt is cute!
UCCS
Colorado Springs, Colorado
Overheard by: Dazeys
Middle aged man power-walking with friend in the park: I wake up, I drink, and I smoke. Then, I go to work, come home, and drink and then smoke. You wanna know why I do this?
Friend: Why?
Middle aged man: I'm fucking depressed, that's why. So I wake up and do it all over again the next day.
Forest Park
St. Louis, Missouri
Girl #1: It's like putting a band-aid on when you need stitches.
Girl #2: Oh, thats a good one.
Girl #3: Yeah, and then the band-aid falls off and it gets infected.
Girl #1: And then you get gangrene and you leg falls off.
Girl #3: Only we could be trying to be supportive and morbid at the same time…
Belleville, Pennsylvania
Loud fat man on bus: When I first found out I had diabetes, I had my wife go out and buy me a big case of pudding cups. I opened each one up and poured them into a tub with some milk.
Friend: Oh?
Loud fat man on bus: My mother-in-law didn't believe I could eat it, but I sat down in front of her and drank the whole thing, just to spite her.
Portland, Oregon
Sorority girl #1: What did he die from?
Sorority girl #2: Cancer.
Sorority girl #1: Gawd! Cancer sucks!
CVS
Charlottesville, Indiana
