Professor: Well, I'm not supposed to state my own political views. (pause) Ah, to hell with it, I'm just going to say it: Sarah Palin is a complete fucking disaster!
University of Maryland
College Park, Maryland
Overheard by: Brittany
Professor: Well, I'm not supposed to state my own political views. (pause) Ah, to hell with it, I'm just going to say it: Sarah Palin is a complete fucking disaster!
University of Maryland
College Park, Maryland
Overheard by: Brittany
Teen girl, incredulously: But you don't call a fattie “fat”!
Teen guy: I know!
Australia
Overheard by: PCGoneWrong
20-something fashionista: Oh, the Spice Girls like totally changed my life!
Beverly Center
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: Shabunapoodle
Sad suit: I got my blackberry wet last night, and now it randomly calls rabbi Goldstein.
Los Angeles, California
Girl #1: So, I walk into my Econ class, and Katie’s there.
Girl #2: Who?
Girl #1: Awkward Katie.
Girl #2: Crazy Katie?
Girl #1: Naked Katie.
Girl #2: Ohhh! There are way too many Katies. You could have just said ‘Naked Katie’ and I would have known what you were talking about.
Delaware, Ohio
Overheard by: None-of-the-above Katie
Thug #1: Everybody calls that girl “Orangutan titties.”
Thug #2: What? Why?
Thug #1: She's the one that flashed everybody back in freshman year at that one assembly, and her titties be all pointy and shit.
Thug #2: I remember that shit, that was pretty fuckin' funny.
Thug #3 (after a long pause): Man, orangutans are fuckin' weird.
Thug #1: Yeah, monkeys be fucked up.
MDN High School, Tempe, Arizona
Overheard by: I saw this whole assembly thing, too.
Huge black guy to other (in fake British accent): Sir Oscar! Are you attempting to take a break?
LA Fitness
Tempe, Arizona
Guy to friend in a bar, after woman suddenly departed: What happened? Where'd she go?
Friend: I'm pretty sure she left. She kept on telling me she has no self-esteem at all and that she has a huge nose. So I just told her, “look, you really don't have a huge nose–you just have a Wicked Witch of the West nose.”
Guy: Fuck. Why do I even bother trying to fix you up with my friends?
Franco's Bar
Highland, Indiana
Guy about to buy beer: ID? ID? I'm 56-motherfucking-years-old! I don't need no ID! (reaches into cart and pulls out items) Here's my damn ID! I'm buying hemorrhoid cream and Fixodent!
Winn Dixie
Hammond, Louisiana
Overheard by: betsy
Girl to friend: So on the way here, I joined the mile high club…by myself!
Auburn University
Auburn, Alabama
