According to Our Extremely Reliable Stoned Tour Guide

American dude: Approximately 90% of the wheat bread in the world is consumed by homosexuals.

Outdoor Cafe
Amsterdam
Netherlands

Overheard by: Ladle

Posted on May 10, 2009
Default, Food, Guys, Netherlands, Restaurants, Sexuality, Words

As Seen in Two Girls, One Cut

Male suit: Did you know that the most common cosmetic surgery these days is vaginal rejuvenation?
Female suit: “Vaginal rejuvenation,” that's a mouthful.

Starbucks
New York

Overheard by: Caged Monkey

Posted on May 1, 2009
Default, Girls, Guys, New York, Questions, Restaurants, Suits, Vagina, Words

We've Given the Bin Ladens Enough, Sir

Crazy Polish man: I need a receipt!
Cashier: Sir, you can't have a receipt if you didn't buy anything.
Crazy Polish man: I need a receipt. I need a receipt or I'll kill you…because I am Osama Bin Laden.

Starbucks
New York City, New York

Posted on April 20, 2009
Character, Crazies, Death & dying, Default, Employees, Foreigners, Names, New York, Offers and requests, Restaurants, Threats, Weirdness

Stay Far Away from the Octomom, Dear Reader

Girl to friend: Then she sends him an e-mail saying that she wants his baby inside her. Talk about mixed messages.

Fred's Diner
Akron, Ohio

Overheard by: Adam

Posted on April 10, 2009
Default, E-mail, Family ties, Girls, Ohio, Restaurants, Weirdness

History's an Unbroken Chain Of Pushing, Wrestling and Girl-Chasing

Four-year-old girl, showing off scrape on arm: I got that on the playground today when Joey pushed me and I fell!
Mom: Joey should keep his hands to himself. Does your teacher tell him that?
Four-year-old girl, like mom is stupid: Moooooom, he's a boy and that's what boys do! They like to push and wrestle and chase girls!
Mom: Um, that may be true, but it still doesn't make it right.

In Line at Starbucks
Bethesda, Maryland