Cashier: Our credit card machine is down right now. Will that be cash or credit?
Customer: Gee, I guess cash… then.
Fast Food Restaurant
Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Overheard by: Kate
Cashier: Our credit card machine is down right now. Will that be cash or credit?
Customer: Gee, I guess cash… then.
Fast Food Restaurant
Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Overheard by: Kate
Host to dumb tourist: Would you like to sit inside or in the garden?
Dumb tourist: What's the weather like in the garden?
Host: I'm going to guess that it's the same as outside the front door you just walked through.
Restaurant
Charleston, South Carolina
Overheard by: Crash
Daddy: If you don't eat…
Three-year-old boy: You'll hit my butt? I like it when you hit my butt, it feels good on my super wee-wee!
Chick-fil-A
Columbia, South Carolina
Overheard by: Carrie
Girl, as friend shows apparently horrible picture of new driver's license: Oh, honey, it's okay! As my sister always says, everyone has their Puerto Rican orphan moment, one time or another…
Arabian Restaurant
São Paulo
Brazil
Overheard by: henrietta
Grandma, with camera, to grandson (on Father's Day): Jordan! Go pose over there next to dad, dad, and daddy.
Macaroni Grill
Orlando, Florida
Overheard by: SoConfused
Young dad, trying to put struggling kid in high chair: Come on, don't be a dick.
Restaurant
Brisbane
Australia
Woman at diner: So I answer it, and he goes “Hi! Happy 9/11!”
Restaurant
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: of bugle be uncouth
Waitress: Do you all need anything else?
Black guy: Do ya'll have some salvation back there in the kitchen?
Black girl: Are you for real? You makin' me laugh so much I'm gonna need a bucket, ya'll got a bucket back there too?
Perkins
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: Deanna Gustav
Mother to small child: So Paul just has to prove he's a woman now. So that should be fine.
Restaurant
London
England
Overheard by: sneaking a peek
Asian teenage girl: Wait, so did Jesus ejaculate wine?
Starbucks
Red Bank, New Jersey
