As Seen in Douching Miss Daisy

Greenpeace activist to couple walking out of grocery store: Are you guys concerned about our environment?
Elderly couple: Definitely! We recycle, and we take showers together!

Mothers Market
Costa Mesa, California

Overheard by: arie

Posted on July 17, 2015
Bathing, California, Couples, Default, Old folks, People, Questions, Relationships, Stores

Who Also Happens to Be My Husband.

Teen mum #1 with baby in pushchair: Ah! Lovely baby boy! Who's the father?
Teen mum #2 with baby in pushchair: That scumbag from the pub a few months back.

Clothes Store
Dartford
England

Posted on July 16, 2015
England, Insults, Kids, Moms, Parenting, Stores, Teens

I Grow Weary Of Cheesy Pick-Up Lines

Lady shopper on cell: I was just told by a Mexican guy that I should eat more cheese, so I'll have a bigger ass.

Value Village
Bellingham, Washington

Posted on July 16, 2015
Advice, Default, Food, Offers and requests, Stores, Washington, Women

Some Babies Learn to Run Away Before They Can Walk

Loud fat ghetto chick to baby: See dat? See dat baby walking? That's what you need to be doing. I'm sick of carrying yo' ass around.

Target Parking Lot
Florissant, Missouri

Posted on July 15, 2015
Advice, Ass, Chicks, Fat people, Kids, Missouri, Moms, Parenting, Should have used a condom, Stores

When Culinary Students Have Orgies

Tiny college girl waiting in line: The cookies are soooooo good!
Tall male friend, confused: The ice cream?
Tiny college girl: The penises!
Tall male friend: Oh!
Tiny college girl: We just didn't let them cool!

Stop & Shop
Manhattan, New York

Posted on July 10, 2015
Food, Friends, New York, Penis, Sorority types, Stores

Why Are These Bills Sticking Together?

Woman: Sorry, I have to pay in singles.
Cashier: That's okay, people do all the time. (asking innocently) Are you a waitress?
Woman: No, honey. My career is a little less wholesome than that.
Cashier: (stutters and looks at her screen) Alright then, your total is $27.45.

Kroger
Cincinnati, Ohio

Posted on July 8, 2015
Compare and contrast, Default, Employees, Jobs & Careers, Money, Ohio, Questions, Stores, Women

You Don't Have a Dog, Sir.

Old man: I'll have two scoops of chocolate raspberry truffle in a waffle cone, and a baby cone for my dog. He's the one who made us stop here.

Brusters Ice Cream
Atlanta, Georgia

Overheard by: Caylin

Posted on July 5, 2015
Animals, Food, Georgia, Old folks, Stores, Weirdness

The Fauxcock Repels Gay Predators

Guy: So all I have to do is get some gel and spike my butt hair.

Target
Salem, Massachusetts

Posted on June 29, 2015
Ass, Default, Guys, Hair, Health & Hygiene, Massachusetts, Stores, Weirdness

Usually They Just Ask Us to Keep the Blood Splatter to a Minimum

Lady on cell pumping gas): Y'know, even when he picked up the knife, I just didn't expect the cops to get involved…

Shell Gas Station
Atlanta, Georgia

Overheard by: Just filling my tank, thanks

Posted on June 27, 2015
Crimes, Default, Georgia, On the phone, Stores, Violence, Women

It's Been the Top Story on CNN All Week

White trash man to white trash woman: So did you hear the news?
White trash woman: No, what?
White trash man (sighing despairingly): Aggie broke her corn-broom.
White trash woman, looking stricken: Oh, no!

Giant Tiger Store
Napanee, Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: Rockbot

Posted on June 24, 2015
Canadia, Cleanliness, Default, Guys, Questions, Stores, Weirdness, Women

Stores