20-something guy in the middle of a group: Guys, guys. I've got big news.
(group quiets down)
20-something guy: I just got a text from Ross. It says “Let's put it this way: they've stopped the ride, are cleaning up my vomit, and I'm leaving in a wheelchair. Spaceship Earth.”
(group cheers)
Disney World
Orlando, Florida
Woman #1: So, you think he is?
Woman #2: No, you don't really think he is?
Woman #3: Hell, yes! I know he is. He is cheating on his wife and me. I'm gonna cut off his dick and then quit! That'll teach him.
http://eavesdropdc.blogspot.com/2007/08/hide-your-pet-rabbits-gentlemen.html
Overheard by: Jon
Eight-year-old kid in line for Universal Studios park ticket: I know how to get a discount ticket.
Eight-year-old friend: How?
Eight-year-old kid: You get your friend to come along with you, then you stab him in the neck and say “My friend’s dying, can we have discount tickets?”
Universal Studios
Los Angeles, California
Girl #1: So, does your boyfriend know you’re bi?
Girl #2: What? No way! If he found out, he would fry me!
Girl #1: Fry you?
Girl #2: Yes! He would fry me! With a Jesus stick!
Cupertino High School
Cupertino, California
Overheard by: shyinvisiblegirl
Woman to friend: And her therapist is saying she doesn't need any more therapy sessions. I mean, she was cutting herself at camp a only month ago!
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/355805033/shell-be-perfect-for-a-band.html
Overheard by: not appropriate in the hardware store
Boy #1: I shot my friend in the foot once.
Boy #2: What! How?
Boy #1: Well, we were really high in the woods, and my friend was wearing bunny slippers. He stuck his foot out of a bush and I thought it was a real rabbit… so I shot it!
Boy #2: What the fuck?!
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: McKenzie
Wannabe thug, carrying Celtics flag: First I'm gonna get blood on it, and then ash!
Portsmouth, New Hampshire
Waitress talking in the kitchen: I'm going to come back there and smack you till you smile. (now sings loudly) I'm going to come back there and smack you till you smile!
International House of Pancakes
Kansas
Library worker girl: That's a cute bag.
Library worker girl with clear purse: Thanks!
Boss man: But then everyone can see everything you have!
Library worker girl with clear purse: It's not like I got a gun or anything… I can always hide things between the books…
Library worker girl: Like your gun?
Kent State University Library
Kent, Ohio
