Weirdness

Female student to friend at bus stop: So, he was, like, freakishly quiet, but every now and then he would bust out with something that, you know, we would say, you know, like, (bursts into song) “Do you like waffles? Yeah, I like waffles!” (in normal voice) And, you know, I would be, like, “Woah! He is a real person.”

University of Oklahoma

Overheard by: becauseobviouslyallnormalpeoplelikewaffles

Guy: Well, I mean the sun was coming up, and we went and got sandwiches afterwards, and rolled another joint.
Bemused girl: All this is setting the scene nicely, but it doesn't explain how you ended up masturbating on a school roof together.
Guy: We were twenty feet apart with our backs to each other, it wasn't gay or anything!

Cork
Ireland

Teacher, lecturing on post WWII German artwork: Creepy sneaky guy is watching you!

History Class
Eugene, Oregon

Guy: Oh my god, she hates me!
Girl: What? Why?
Guy: Cause I'm the kid who threw a sandwich at her!

Tacoma, Washington

Trendy girl on cell: It was stuck to my boob this morning. I had to go clean it off… it was all bloody and gross. (pause) Right on my boob. I know… Eew!

University of Phoenix, Arizona

Overheard by: Sarah Neill

Guy: Do you know how I know you were singing correctly?
Girl: You saw me sucking in my stomach?
Guy: No. When you started spitting at me!
Girl: I can't help that I have great diction!

Saint Peter's College
New Jersey

Waiter #1: We need to get this shit done and get out of here.
Waiter #2: Yep. I need to get to the bar. Molly's not gonna fuck herself tonight.

Indianapolis, Indiana

Overheard by: Shatmandu

Girl #1: With the right emphasis, anything can sound dirty.
Girl #2: I'll jump on your trampoline.
Girl #1: I'll park in your car park.
Girl #2: I'll reverse up your back alley.
(pause)
Girl #2: I think it just got too literal.
Girl #1: Me too.

Sydney
Australia

Guy in “I heart NJ” shirt: Could you take our picture?
German tourist: Sure.
Guy in “I heart NJ” shirt: Thanks a lot, man.
German tourist: You luv New Jer-see?
Guy in “I heart NJ” shirt: Hell yeah!
German tourist: You za own-lee vun!

London
England

Overheard by: Joyful One

Six-year-old girl at the zoo: (drops French fries one by one)
Dad: Why are you dropping French fries?
Six-year-old girl: To feed them!
Dad: No one wants your old French fries.
Six-year-old girl: You're an old French fry!

http://eavesdropdc.blogspot.com/2008/06/sticks-and-stones.html

Overheard by: Dave