Weirdness

Dude #1: I'm a massage therapist and an electrician.
Dude #2: Oh yeah? Did you go to school to learn how to be an electrician?
Dude #1: Naw, I hooked up with this guy who had been doing it for four years and owned a five million dollar house. He just handed me a drill and told me to go for it.

Petaluma, California

Overheard by: lith

Popcorn hater: Oh my god! You’re going to walk out of there with a popcorn-bag fashioned diaper, aren’t you?
Popcorn enthusiast: It’s supportive and delicious!

Tempe, Arizona

Overheard by: Meghan

Homely housewife: And she said, “are you going to blot it?” and I said, “of course, that's why I collect napkins.”

Fayette Mall
Lexington, Kentucky

Overheard by: verticalQ

Girl: I'm not sure if I can be bothered dying.

London
England

Boy to friend: I'm totally capable of giving birth to a live teddy bear.

High School
Clarksville, Maryland

Girl #1 in bathroom stall: My poop looks awesome! It has things in it! Come, look!
Girl #2 (waiting outside stall): No.
Girl #1: Come on!
Girl #2: No.
Girl #1: Please?
Girl #2: No! I never will.
Girl #1: I just won't flush it and then you'll have to look.
Girl #2: You better flush that shit!

Grand Rapids, Michigan

Effeminate tourist guy on cell: So yeah, it was rigidly pressed in the watershed…

Cottage Street
Bar Harbor, Maine

Girl standing at the bar: I train armadillos to race horses around banks.

Killarney's
Hamilton, New Jersey

Overheard by: I wish I had heard the beginning of that conversation…

Student: So then I turned round and there was a snake in my bacon!

Birchwood Community High School
Warrington
England

Guy to friend: And then she said, “I am not even half the man she used to be.”

Oxford
England

Overheard by: Well, she WAS born in Germany