Russian professor: Grammarlicious definition makes them “gringo locos.” (pause) Now that you've all been permanently scarred…
Arizona State University
Russian professor: Grammarlicious definition makes them “gringo locos.” (pause) Now that you've all been permanently scarred…
Arizona State University
Girl #1: With the right emphasis, anything can sound dirty.
Girl #2: I'll jump on your trampoline.
Girl #1: I'll park in your car park.
Girl #2: I'll reverse up your back alley.
(pause)
Girl #2: I think it just got too literal.
Girl #1: Me too.
Sydney
Australia
20-something American guy: Hermaphrodites are real?
20-something American girl: Well, what did you think they were?
20-something American guy: I thought they were a made-up word, like “unicorn” or something.
Bar
Munich
Germany
Girl in class: Dan, can you spread me out? (pause) Oh, that sounded wrong.
University of Northern Colorado
Mother to young son: The sign says that polar bears are carnivores. That means they eat mostly plants, but will eat meat when they can find it.
Henry Vilas Zoo
Madison, Wisconsin
Overheard by: weeping for the future
Female track jock, to friend: So I had this fucking hair up my fucking ass.
Private school football coach, overhearing: Ladies, please watch you language.
Female track jock: I had a hair up my butt.
El Paso, Texas
Girl on cell: It's going to fucking rain in circa one hour.
University of Pennsylvania
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: grad student
Mom to toddler girl: What fish should we get today? Salmon or tilapia or flounder?
Toddler girl: Is that “flounder” like in Little Mermaid?
Mom: Well, it's a fish, like flounder was.
Toddler girl: I want to eat flounder! Let's cook him. Mommy, can we eat Nemo too?
Costco
Fairfax, Virginia
Drunk chick: Haha, you're a cheeky queen.
Drunk queer: Don't call me a cheeky queen! I'm a dirty bitch!
Provincetown, Massachusetts
