Although Roseanne Was Pretty Funny

Cafeteria kid: Acting would be really boring if we were all giant slugs.

High School Cafeteria
Victoria, B.C.
Canadia

Overheard by: Sefie

Posted on February 6, 2016
Animals, Canadia, Default, Kids, School [Elem., Middle, & High], Stupidity, Weirdness

For You Cat Lovers, It Was a Dog

Flight attendant over PA after bump during taxi: Don’t worry guys, it was just a cat!

Southwest Airlines, BWI airport
Baltimore, Maryland

Posted on January 28, 2016
Airports & flights, Animals, Flight attendants, Maryland

Monkeys: Ooooo…

Cholo #1, tapping roughly on glass: Heeeey monkey! Oh! Monkey!
Treehugger in sandals with socks, hysterically: Stop it, stop it! Oh my god!
(cholo #2 and #3 snicker and speak Spanish to each other)
Cholo #1: Crazy gringa…needa get laid.
Treehugger: Well, at least I didn't have ten kids by the time I was twenty! Like your mother!

National Zoo
Washington, DC

Overheard by: Meaggoo

Posted on January 26, 2016
Age and ageing, Animals, Default, Family ties, Kids, Latinos, Sex, Tourist attractions, Washington, DC

The Duck and I Were Reenacting the Dunkirk Evacuation!

Chav, showing off in front of group of underage girls: Yes bruv, you don't even know, there was this duck, yeah, and I snapped its neck, innit! It was swimmin' around with its head loose making stupid noises!
Slightly older chav friend: Breds, you're talking shit, man. Number one, if you snapped a duck's neck it wouldn't still be swimming. B, I was there, remember, that fucking duck bit you on the hand, bruv and you screamed like a woman and ran away.

Cambridgeshire
England

Overheard by: Tim C

Posted on January 23, 2016
Animals, Bragging, England, Hobos, Memory lane, Violence

I’m Not Allowed to Use Them at Home

Biology professor, on earthworm digestive systems: And I’m including this part because I enjoy saying words like “anus”.

South Dakota State University
South Dakota

Posted on January 21, 2016
Animals, Body parts, Class, Creepsters, Education, Science, South Dakota, Teachers, Weirdness, Wishes, Words

Yeah, and I Had to Put Them Down!

Teen #1: Why didn't you send it to me?
Teen #2: I don't know. I sent you the humping cats.

Harrison, Michigan

Overheard by: Lauren

Posted on January 19, 2016
Animals, Michigan, Questions, Teens

Aced It!

Girl, after US history exam: How did you do on the essays?
Serious boy: Well, I drew hand turkeys on three pages of the answer booklet, and on the fourth I drew a picture of Samuel Glompers riding a tortoise while holding a marble cake.

High School Gymnasium
West Palm Beach, Florida