To What Extent Would It Involve Nut Gathering?

University administrator: I’ve been thinking that I should start my own cult. It doesn’t have to be anything sexual. It could involve squirrels.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/289741685/i-do-not-like-where-this-is-going.html

Overheard by: count me in!

Posted on November 5, 2015
Animals, Default, Employees, Overheard in Minneapolis, Religion, Sexuality, Weirdness

Like Clams.

Guy with hair down to waist and death metal t-shirt: I really enjoy eating animals that have the ability to eat humans.

http://overheardinphilly.blogspot.com/2007/05/feeling-is-mutual-im-sure.html

Overheard by: horrified zoo-enthusiast

Posted on October 28, 2015
Animals, Guys, Overheard in Philly

No More Scientific American for You, Young Lady.

Teacher: What that show didn't tell you is that ferrets smell like dirty wet dog.
Seven-year-old girl: Well, you know you can get their scent glands removed.
Teacher: Yeah, but is that really good for them?
Seven-year-old girl: I think it's about the same as removing a dog's testicles.

Seattle, Washington

Posted on October 5, 2015
Animals, Balls, Body parts, Compare and contrast, Education, Health & Hygiene, Kids, Questions, Students, Teachers, Washington

Theme Parks Are Quite Different in Europe

Loud, fat american teen: I have to take the biggest leak ever. Pause. And then I want to check out those hedgehogs.

Market in Freiburg, Germany

Posted on September 21, 2015
Animals, Default, Etiquette, Fat people, Germany, Pee, Stores, Teens, Tourists, Wishes

I'm Cuckoo As a Table-Saw Today.

Director of the office of judicial affairs: It was a blizzard. It was snowing so much, it was snowing like a pig. (pause) I have no idea why I just said that.

Orientation
University, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Emurii

Posted on September 20, 2015
Animals, Bosses, Compare and contrast, Massachusetts, Weather, Weirdness

If You Need a Longer Break, “Fluffy Pink Clouds 101” Is Right Down the Hall

Linda: Ugh, this class is so depressing!
Professor: Let’s all take ten seconds to think about baby lambs to make Linda feel happy. [pause] Okay, back to Terri Schiavo!

Marist College
Poughkeepsie, New York

Posted on September 14, 2015
Animals, Colleges & Universities, Compare and contrast, Education, Feelings, Girls, Gripes, Insults, New York, Offers and requests, Philosophy, Teachers

Wait, No, a Dolphin

Guy to girlfriend: It sounds like we hit a whale.

AirTran plane from New Orleans to New York

Overheard by: Jofo

Posted on September 9, 2015
Airports & flights, Animals, Guys

Don’t Trust Skinny People with Your Food

Skinny guy #1: I’m thinking our restaurant should have, like, taxidermied animals and tomato plants and stuff.
Skinny guy #2: Way cool!
Skinny guy #1: That way it could be like a museum of natural history full of the things people are eating, living or dead.

http://overheardinpdx.blogspot.com/2007/04/business-plan.html

Overheard by: rich