Chemistry professor, demonstrating suction filtration: … And you have to stop the cock before you turn on the water, or it will just [frantic hand motion] come all over your face.
Smith College
Northampton, Massachusetts
Overheard by: amused non-major
Man beside pen with goat: I am not paying that much for that! I am not buying your goat!
Goatkeeper: Nobody's buying the goat.
Man beside pen with goat: That's it, I'm taking the goat!
Goatkeeper: Nobody's taking the goat, we're not selling the goat!
Large passerby: There are no goats in Cameroon.
Toronto
Canadia
Boyfriend looking at stone sculpture of camel: Yo, what do camels eat?
Girlfriend: Camels eat people.
Boyfriend: I think they eat grass.
Girlfriend: No. Camels eat people.
Boyfriend, turning to passersby: Excuse me, what do camels eat?
Passerby #1: Uhh…I think they eat plants.
Girlfriend: No! Camels eat people!
Passerby #2: But, look, they don't have any claws or fangs. They can't eat people.
Passerby #1, disgusted: They eat plants.
Girlfriend, scoffing: There's no plants in the desert! That's why they eat people. Camels eat people!
Royal Ontario Museum
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: Camels should eat some people…
Female student #1: Can you ride me piggyback after class?
Female student #2: Can *he* ride *you* after class?
Female student #1, giggling: That's not what I meant!
Male student: Wait, don't you have, like, 20 cats?
Female student #1: (slaps him)
Female student #2: You do have a lot of cats…
Simmons College
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Yoshi
University administrator: I’ve been thinking that I should start my own cult. It doesn’t have to be anything sexual. It could involve squirrels.
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/289741685/i-do-not-like-where-this-is-going.html
Overheard by: count me in!
Guy with hair down to waist and death metal t-shirt: I really enjoy eating animals that have the ability to eat humans.
http://overheardinphilly.blogspot.com/2007/05/feeling-is-mutual-im-sure.html
Overheard by: horrified zoo-enthusiast
Teacher: What that show didn't tell you is that ferrets smell like dirty wet dog.
Seven-year-old girl: Well, you know you can get their scent glands removed.
Teacher: Yeah, but is that really good for them?
Seven-year-old girl: I think it's about the same as removing a dog's testicles.
Seattle, Washington
Director of the office of judicial affairs: It was a blizzard. It was snowing so much, it was snowing like a pig. (pause) I have no idea why I just said that.
Orientation
University, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Emurii
Linda: Ugh, this class is so depressing!
Professor: Let’s all take ten seconds to think about baby lambs to make Linda feel happy. [pause] Okay, back to Terri Schiavo!
Marist College
Poughkeepsie, New York
