Science professor: This is plastic deformation, like what happens to those baby-seal catchers. You know, the plastic that comes around soda cans? Sometimes you catch penguins too, but those are much harder–they run really fast, and they have no regard for their bodies. They just throw themselves off cliffs.
Boston University
Boston, Massachusetts
Pol-sci professor: Nuking other countries is kind of rude.
University of Memphis
Memphis, Tennessee
Professor, showing slide: And here we have another example of a seal or stamp, with a procession of men along the bottom. However, they could be aliens. (pause) Anyways…
Art History Class
University of Alabama
Overheard by: Bennett
Girl #1: It’s such a shame. I mean, if only there was some semblance of religious tolerance…
Girl #2: I know. Muslims, Christians, Jews… It’s all the same god, but different rules.
Girl #3: Wait, is a Muslim just a black Jew?
Girl #1: … No. A black Jew is a Jewish person who is black. It’s a different religion.
Girl #3: Oh. Okay. That’s confusing.
Girl #2: No, no, it’s really not.
Hofstra University
Long Island, New York
Freshmen dorm girl: Take it from someone who swallows quite often: it's actually pretty fun!
Washington State University
Pullman, Washington
Professor: How old are you?
Visiting high school student: Seventeen.
Professor: And you're not married? Well, you've come to the right place!
Freed-Hardeman University
Henderson, Tennessee
Overheard by: Lisa
Professor: Well, I'm not supposed to state my own political views. (pause) Ah, to hell with it, I'm just going to say it: Sarah Palin is a complete fucking disaster!
University of Maryland
College Park, Maryland
Overheard by: Brittany
Weird emo girl: I've still got bruises from the first time she hit me with a wheelbarrow!
Bridgwater College
Somerset
England
Emphatic girl: Babies can't watch porn!
Smith College
Northampton, Massachusetts
Overheard by: TARDIS Dyke
Sociology professor: Today, we'll be talking about sex.
(students mumble)
Sociology professor: I heard that. (pause) How much do I know about it? Well, I can tell you: less than my cheating ex-girlfriend.
University Classroom
Virginia
Overheard by: Nicole
