Girl to boyfriend: I am the clownfish to your anenome.
Salt Lake City, Utah
Girl to boyfriend: I am the clownfish to your anenome.
Salt Lake City, Utah
Cute girl: I have great tits!
Gay friend, skeptically: I guess they're nice…
Cute girl: No, really. Each of my last four boyfriends or longish-term hookup buddies were ass-men when they met me, and by the time we split, they'd each been converted to boob-men.
Gay friend, still skeptical: That may just mean your ass isn't great.
Cute girl: Damn, you're so cup-half-empty. My ass is great. My tits are just phenomenal.
Manhattan, New York
Girl, looking down her shirt: I can’t tell if that’s pork or a hickey.
Friend: You’re so awesome!
Bellingham, Washington
Overheard by: Muffler
Girl, wearing leather pants and high heels, pushing a cart containing D batteries, duct tape, and huge bag of rice, on cell: I don’t know why he’s so smug, I told him what I would do to him if I caught him again. [pause] Okay, well I’ve almost got everything I need, I’ll be right over.
Wal-Mart
Lufkin, Texas
Overheard by: wtf?
Girl passing two students eating: They have corn!
JC Bistro, George Mason University
Fairfax County, Virginia
Overheard by: Candice
Girl: It's like Everybody Loves Raymond, but with white people.
Columbia, Maryland
Overheard by: Liz
Pouting newlywed wife: I feel like we don't spend enough time together.
Seething newlywed husband: (grinds teeth)
Pouting newlywed wife: Enough quality time.
Seething newlywed husband: (remains silent)
Pouting newlywed wife: Would you like me to tell you what quality time is?
Seething newlywed husband: (about to speak, thinks better of it)
Pouting newlywed wife: 23 hours a day.
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/465741992/one-hour-is-plenty-of-time-for-a-lot-of-drugs.html
Overheard by: good, that leaves one hour for him to think of a response
Drunk girl: Sometimes I think I'm an alcoholic, but then I watch Intervention and I realize I'm just a love machine.
Syracuse University, New York
