Gripes

Guy #1: Sometimes it's hard being a guy.
Guy #2: Why is that?
Guy #1: Well, I try to stay focused and get shit done, but every time a female walks by I feel obligated to turn around and check out her tits and ass. I just want to get through a project without being distracted by tits and ass.
Guy #2: Yeah, but don't you worry you might miss the world's greatest tits and ass?
Guy #1: Exactly!

Denver, Colorado

Overheard by: sean

Large white lady to small Mexican husband: I’m bleeding. [Pokes hubby, who ignores her.] Heyyy, I’m bleeding from my neck! Don’t you care?! [Hubby puts headphones on and looks out window.] I wish I knew you didn’t speak English before I married you!

http://overheardinpdx.blogspot.com/2007/06/perfect-couple.html

Overheard by: corwin

Girl #1: I was so disappointed when I found out Neil Patrick Harris is gay!
Girl #2: I know, right?
Girl #1: It's such a loss for womankind!
Girl #2: Men don't deserve him!

Women's Dressing Room
Western Michigan University

Woman: My life is surreal. His life is about anger and priorities.

http://overheardinpdx.blogspot.com/2007/04/married-to-mob.html

Overheard by: rich

Barista #1: He expects me to work from, like, nine to five all next week!
Barista #2: What?! That’s like a job!

Starbucks
Virginia

Overheard by: Person with a job

Chick #1: What’s wrong?
Chick #2: Today I spent, like, an hour getting a dog hair out of my eyeball.
Chick #1: What? How did you do that?
Chick #2: I don’t know, but every day I wake up with dog hair in my eyeballs.

http://overheardatwestern.blogspot.com/

Overheard by: christina

Woman on cell: I know! I’m going to testify in court tomorrow for him so he doesn’t go to jail for ten years. The least he can do is give me ride home!

Red line metro
Washington, DC

Overheard by: Mary

Guy: You’re allowed to wipe boogers on my girlfriend and fart in her face, but I can’t hit your girlfriend?! That is so hypocritical!

Driver’s Ed class
Long Island, New York

Overheard by: Chrissy

Extremely drunk chick crying: I love him so much and he doesn’t even know! He’s my soulmate.
Exasperated sober chick: He’s fictional!

Armory Square
Syracuse, New York

Crying girl to friend: And my paper had all these, like, negative comments on it a-a-and then she pulled me aside and compared my paper to people who take English as a second language.

Virginia Commonwealth University, Virginia