Guys

Guy #1: Dude, have you seen this picture?
Guy #2: Nah, dude. Show it to me.
(guy #1 shows guy #2 picture of naked girl in a scenic background)
Guy #2: Dude, do you think it's gay that I think the scenery is the prettiest thing in this picture?
Guy #3, walking by: No, you just want to fuck the planet.

Carmel, Indiana

Guy: Hold my backpack for me.
Turkish girl: No.
Guy: If you hold my backpack for me, I'll let you into the European Union.

Middlebury College
Middlebury, Vermont

Guy to friend: So he asked “How's the leather work going?” So we went out and got some skins and string and made some loincloths.

Pierce County Annex
Tacoma, Washington

Guy to woman sitting down: The really great thing is that you'll never have to wear pants again!

Portland, Oregon

Dude #1: Man, I hope it doesn't rain, I left my windows down.
Dude #2: It did rain just a little while ago.
Dude #1: Where? Outside?
Dude #2: What?

Lafayette, Louisiana

Girl: All you Boston niggaz suck, ya'll pussies be leaving the party at two.
Guy: Cause niggaz get shot at three.

Boston, Massachusetts

Overheard by: Sam

British guy on cell: Ugh! I just stuck my umbrella in something that resembles feces!

MARTA
Atlanta, Georgia

Guy #1: Just admit it, man.
Guy #2: Admit what? That I'm great and wonderful and perfect in every way shape and form? Alright, I'm great and wonderful and perfect in every way shape and form!
Guy #1: No, admit that you're crazier than me!
Guy #2: Yeah, well…you're just Mr “Too sexy for my shirt,” and I'm Mr “Too sexy for my life,” but seriously, I'm so smart and everyone loves me.
Guy #3: You're just lyin' to yourself, man.
Guy #2: I'm too sexy for the world! That's just the way it is. I'm the next Albert Einstein. Everyone will soon realize that they love me. You all know that I'm right, so say that I am always right! You're dumb and I'm smart. Everyone loves me.
Bus driver: Will you guys be quiet? No one wants to hear this!

Manhattan, New York

Overheard by: Lulu

Angry British guy on phone: My name's 'arry. No! 'arry! 'arry! Dammit, no! 'arry, like 'arry Potter! Thank you.
Girl nearby: You just made my life a little better.

Arizona

Overheard by: Meg:)

Girl to roommate guy: You should really clean the blood out of your clown shoes.

Colby-Sawyer College Dorm
New London, New Hampshire

Overheard by: Jess