Eight-year-old boy playing Nintendo: Die! Die! Diediediediediediedie!
Older brother: Isn't that a little violent?
Eight-year-old: I'm goddam Kirby! I can do anything I want!
Houston, Texas
Eight-year-old boy playing Nintendo: Die! Die! Diediediediediediedie!
Older brother: Isn't that a little violent?
Eight-year-old: I'm goddam Kirby! I can do anything I want!
Houston, Texas
Dad: Oh, the menu says they have fish tacos. Have you ever had a fish taco? I've never had a fish taco.
Mom: No, I haven't. I don't think I'm going to get a fish taco.
Young daughter (under her breath): Fish tacos make me think bad things.
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Overheard by: they make me think bad things too
Man: You're going to need to empty your bladder.
Little girl (in squeaky high voice): I don't wanna empty my bladder!
Man (unashamedly loud): You'll need to empty your bladder before you get on the plane!
Little girl: Not fair!
St. Paul Airport
Minneapolis
Oldish Ukrainian woman: How you have babies with hips like this? How you do this? So skinny. Tsk, tsk.
Skinny chick: Huh?
Oldish Ukrainian woman: Here, eat my husband's sausage. He fill you up. Eat! Eat!
Edmonton
Alberta
Canadia
Overheard by: not so skinny
Lost mother with child to employee: Excuse me, sir? Where can I find the exit?
Employee (bluntly): Um, you have to buy something before you can leave.
Lost mother with child: (blank stare)
Sam Ash
Orlando, Florida
Overheard by: Stole something instead
Guy: Just trust me on this one and go along with it one more time.
Girl: I did that last time and ended up with random things up my ass.
Stoneham, Massachusetts
Girl to friends: I've always wanted to dress up like Jesus… My grandmother would be so proud of me.
St. John's
Newfoundland
Canadia
Guy to friend, matter-of-factly: You know he’s just teaching there for the kielbasa.
Macalester College
St. Paul, Minnesota
Professor, about a book currently sold out at the campus bookstore: This book has been required in my class for years. All the upperclassmen have this book. Borrow it! (whispering) Steal it!
Point Park University
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: ZB
Sophomore #1, during heated debate about zombie safety: Wait! What if there were alien zombies?
Sophomore #2: Shut up! We're talking about realistic stuff, here!
Theatre Class, Rossview High
Clarksville, Tennessee
