To the Maximum Extent Practicable

20-something to friend: How much next are you?

Wal-Mart
Tuscaloosa, Alabama

Posted on April 2, 2009
Alabama, Compare and contrast, Default, Friends, Questions, Stores, Weirdness

The Back Of the Shelves?

Black student: Where's the ethnic section?
White librarian: The what?
Black student: The ethnic section…you know, where all the books by black people are.
White librarian: We don't have an ethnic section, dear. You'll have to browse the shelves.

Longview College, Missouri

Overheard by: Sarah

Posted on April 2, 2009
Black people, Books, Colleges & Universities, Default, Missouri, Offers and requests, Questions, Race, Students

Totally Struck, but Only Partially Killed

Girl #1, hearing lightning beep: What was that?
Girl #2: It's totally the sound that goes off when you're about to be killed by lightning.
Girl #1: Oh my god, I would totally laugh about that, except for my friend totally got struck by lightning this summer.

Fort Collins, Colorado State University

Overheard by: J-Rock

Posted on April 1, 2009
Colleges & Universities, Colorado, Death & dying, Default, Girls, Questions, Weirdness

…And Scuttling Away, Like a Hermit Crab.

Female shopper, surveying bathing suits: The crotch in this looks a little, uh…narrow. Tiny, actually. I feel like it doesn't provide full coverage.
Sales girl: I know. It's sort of the style now, though.
Female shopper: What do you mean, “style”? My labia showing?
Other shopper, walking up: Yeah, I agree. I don't want my vagina suddenly falling out at the beach.

American Apparel, Capitol Hill
Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: Celessa

Posted on April 1, 2009
Clothes, Compare and contrast, Customers, Default, Employees, Fashion, Feelings, Girls, Questions, Stores, Vagina, Washington, Words

Who Had Means, Motive and Opportunity?

Foreign dressing room attendant, opening all stall doors: It stinks in here! Who pooped? Someone pooped in here, and I'm gonna find it. Where is the poop? Who did it?

Ross
Melbourne, Florida

Posted on March 31, 2009
Default, Employees, Florida, Foreigners, Offers and requests, Poop, Questions

Pepperidge Farm's Goyfish Snack Socks Kinda Missed the Boat

Obnoxious teenage boy: No, that guy's really weird. I mean, did you hear what he did last year?
Friends: No.
Obnoxious teenage boy: He took a slice of cheese and two pieces of ham. Then he got a pair of socks and he put them in an aquarium…

Eugene, Oregon

Posted on March 31, 2009
Clothes, Default, Food, Friends, Guys, Oregon, Questions, Teens, Weirdness

Back in My Day, It Wasn't a Race Without at Least a Little Mooing

Man to daughter entering race: So, do you have to quack while you run, or…how does that work?

4th of July Parade
Brighton, Michigan

Overheard by: Tonya

Posted on March 31, 2009
Dads, Default, Games, Guys, Michigan, Offers and requests, Questions

And No Pants!

Little boy: I wanna be a duck.
Mother: You wanna be a duck?
Little boy: Yeah, so I can walk around with my eyes closed.

Australia

Posted on March 31, 2009
Animals, Australia, Body parts, Default, Guys, Kids, Questions, Women

…After Tuna Wrestling in Them.

Woman #1: I have to return some things to Victoria's Secret.
Woman #2: Why?
Woman #1: I don't like the way they smell.

Sandusky, Ohio

Overheard by: NOT a VS smeller

Posted on March 28, 2009
Clothes, Default, Names, Ohio, Questions, Weirdness, Women

What Else Is There to Do in Des Moines When It's Dark?

Girl #1: So Gabby's RA was telling her that someone shat on the carpet in the hallway the other night.
Girl #2: Wait, were they drunk or something?
Girl #1: I would think so. It was nighttime.

Drake University
Des Moines, Iowa

Posted on March 27, 2009
Colleges & Universities, Default, Drinking & drunks, Girls, Iowa, Poop, Questions

Questions