Bus

Young teen girl: So he fucked both your mums, and that's how you two are related?
Boy #1: Yeah.
Boy #2: But he didn't start fucking my mum till after she had me.

Bus
Wollongong
Australia

Overheard by: definately not related

20-something girl: I love hairdressing, it's the best job. I get to talk about me all day long to everybody!

City Bus
Sydney
Australia

Overheard by: Rose

Guy on crowded bus to friend: My undies are going to smell like Mexican food for a day and a half.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/363428193/thats-what-happens-when-you-crap-your-pants.html

Overheard by: I don't want to know

Six-year-old, matter-of-factly when seeing fireworks go off at Magic Kingdom: They blew up Mickey… Now only Minnie is left.

Disneyworld Bus
Orlando, Florida

Old lady to female bus driver: I need to get laid.

Portland, Oregon

Overheard by: exactly

Crazy lady yelling at bus stop sign: I wish someone would rape me in an inappropriate way!

Chicago, Illinois

Teenage boy: Hey, James, don't you remember when you stuck Smarties down your shirt and rubbed them on your nipples?

On the Bus
Canadia

Overheard by: Kels

Drunk bus rider #1: Damn, this bus is always so slow!
Drunk bus rider #2: I swear, if I was a wizard, I would turn this bus into a rabbit… But that's fantasy stuff, and I'm not that into fantasy.

Seattle, Washington

30-something large man: That book by George Orwell, 1984, is a prophecy!
Skinny guy sitting next to him: Yeah, yeah, man.
30-something large man: Because in 1985, the government took over, and they were the ones selling all the crack and dope. I would know. I was working for them.

Transit Bus
Olympia, Washington

Overheard by: scooting farther away

Middle-aged man on bus: I made the mistake of letting my grandkids come over Saturday. They are nothing but little virus factories!

http://overheardinpdx.blogspot.com/2007/08/offspring.html

Overheard by: micah