Asian dude: I don’t know. Something about the alcohol there gets me drunk.
Friends: Yeah!
California State University Dominguez Hills
Carson, California
Overheard by: Danial
Asian dude: I don’t know. Something about the alcohol there gets me drunk.
Friends: Yeah!
California State University Dominguez Hills
Carson, California
Overheard by: Danial
Girl: She’s like a horny guy, only not horny and not a guy.
Cupertino High School
Cupertino, California
Professor: Say that you were to walk into class, and I was wearing…a red thong.
(students laugh) I'm not done. I also have sequins on my nipples–and my hair is in a red Mohawk. Half of you would turn around and walk out. The other half would think, “Eh, I can always drop the class.”
Santa Rosa Junior College
Santa Rosa, California
Nerdy Asian guy: My friend is having a problem…
Drunk Asian guy: Can you solve it with your penis?
UCLA
California
Overheard by: Amused
Old lady to grown daughter: Well you know what your brother's problem is? He's pussy-whipped!
San Jose, California
Man to store employee: It's one of those real estate investment books, the yellow ones.
Employee: Let's see, follow me… Is this what you were looking for?
Man: No, no, that's the one for idiots, I want the one for dummies.
Barnes & Noble
San Diego, California
Overheard by: Lisa
Guy, as girlfriend walks ahead of him into store: Don’t ever get a girlfriend, man. Fucking lunatic bitches! … She can suck a dick, though.
Gas station
Sacramento, California
Asian girl: Can I have two penises?
Market Street
San Francisco, California
Professor: I'm afraid of being afraid, and so, I am afraid.
San Diego, California
Guy #1: I'm so totally better than him. I have two properly functioning legs.
Guy #2: So does he, they just don't work quite as well as yours.
Guy #1: That's what the crutches are for.
High School
San Diego, California
Overheard by: Alex
