Dude: Just because I watched you out a window for an hour doesn’t mean I’m creepy.
High School Classroom
Englewood, Colorado
Dude: Just because I watched you out a window for an hour doesn’t mean I’m creepy.
High School Classroom
Englewood, Colorado
Little girl: He's drunk, I swear!
Teenage sister: He's not drunk, he's a foreigner.
Highlands Ranch, Colorado
Overheard by: Julia
Drunk girl #1: I’m Wells Fargo!
Drunk girl #2: Really? I’m Wells Fargo, too!
(they gleefully skip off together)
Pearl St Mall
Boulder, Colorado
Yuppie blonde: So I told him, I was like, ‘Don’t call it a party, you know? Just say you’re getting drunk!’
Yuppie brunette: Exactly.
24 Hour Fitness
Denver, Colorado
Chick: Look, if you’re out sniper-ing hobos, it’s not assassination!
Boyfriend: Nope, it’s population control.
High school cafeteria
Englewood, Colorado
(student coughs violently into hands, spewing fake blood)
Lit professor: Oh my god! Are you okay?
Student: (coughing up more blood) Can I go to the bathroom?
Lit professor: Oh my god, go, go!
(student leaves)
Lit professor: (realizing it’s April 1st) Haha… His consumption smells like raspberries.
Colorado University, Boulder
Overheard by: In the back of the classroom
Aging dork #1: I like Star Trek, but not Star Wars because they never pay attention to physics.
Aging dork #2: William Shatner is a pimp.
Peterson Air Force Base
Colorado
Ghetto lady to two young boys: Stop lookin at my pussy!
20 Bus
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: nightfallcub
Girl: My boobs are fun to play with.
Guy: You're just now figuring this out, after 30-some years?
Girl: Hey, I haven't had my boobs that long!
Guy: Okay, 20-some years?
Girl: No, I remember discovering they were fun in the 6th grade. I was in the middle of class, though, so that was kind of awkward.
Denver, Colorado
