Jock: Our soccer team's like the colon–it's probably there for a reason but no one knows what it is.
Friend: That's the appendix.
Westminster, Maryland
Jock: Our soccer team's like the colon–it's probably there for a reason but no one knows what it is.
Friend: That's the appendix.
Westminster, Maryland
Girl, crying or laughing: I just can't believe you love me; I have shown up on your doorstep so fucking wasted.
Guy: Baby, you found a plastic fork in your panties! It's okay! Anyway, it was not one of your better nights.
Girl: Actually, it was one of my better nights.
Mission District
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Judylicious
Student, about the economy: Well, what if I just took my big stick and made them give me their resources?
Professor: Well, let's just imagine that your stick isn't big enough to extract the resources you want. (chuckles) Sometimes there's no pleasure in the big stick. Okay, I'm gonna stop talking about sticks now.
Classroom
UC Santa Cruz, California
Overheard by: Kelly
College girl: The way I see it, chemistry is just like prostitution.
Northern Michigan University
Overheard by: everyone gets screwed?
White cube farmer to another: Chicks don't like dudes with umbrellas. They like wild and crazy guys who aren't afraid of getting their hair wet.
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/305658355/actually-this-is-true.html
Overheard by: alexis
Guy: You!
Smoking, unsuspecting girl: Me? What'd I do?
Guy: Do you know how lonely it's been since you and Dave* quit smoking? Then everyone started to quit! And now you're smoking again?! At first it was all cute: “Awwww, Emily and Dave* are quitting together! They're like each other's rocks!” Then what happened?!
Smoking girl, sheepishly: We sunk.
Guy: And was it your idea for Dave to start rolling his own cigarettes?!
Smoking girl: Yes…
Guy, exasperated: Every time I ask him for a cigarette, it's like smoking a diaper!
New Jersey
Blonde: I have this theory that babies who were born late are like always late to stuff. And babies who were born early, like premature, are always early.
Friend: Really?
Blonde: Yeah, it's like, on my resume.
Brisbane
Australia
Chick #1: She's on a date with a French guy.
(pause)
Chick #2: I bet French cock is like an eclair.
University of Denver, Colorado
Professor, discussing types of fat: Babies aren't fat like… (points at a fat girl) No, I don't want to say that… like my tummy.
University of Georgia
Girl: Do we have any soda?
Guy: We have Pabst. It's pretty much the same.
http://overheardinpdx.blogspot.com/2008/04/give-that-man-blue-ribbon.html
Overheard by: sarafist
