She Has Sex In Very Unusual Places

Crazy drunk lady, whispering: I think I got asbestos on my hands. (in louder voice) Or maybe it's sperm! Heeheeheeheeheehee!

Toronto
Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: EdgingAwayFromHer

Posted on August 2, 2009
Canadia, Crazies, Cum, Drunks, Hands, Sensory experiences, Women

A Problem I Can Solve Simply by Getting a Drunker ID

Drunk college dude, explaining how he got kicked out of a club: They looked at my ID, then they looked at my face. My face was not as sober as my ID.

Metro, Orange Line
Washington, DC

Overheard by: funniest Metro ride ever

Posted on July 29, 2009
Body parts, Compare and contrast, Drinking & drunks, Drunks, Students, Train, Washington, DC

…After What Happened Last Time?

Sober sorostitute with heavy smoker's voice: Like o-m-g, I just decided on my Halloween costume!
Drunk sorostitute, stamping feet: Oh my god! What?! What what what?
Sober sorostitute: Wait for it…wait for it… Little ho peep!
Drunk sorostitute: Can we have sex with the little ho sheep?

Duke University
Durham, North Carolina

Overheard by: Disgusted

Posted on June 30, 2009
Animals, Clothes, Colleges & Universities, Drinking & drunks, Drunks, North Carolina, Questions, Sex, Sorority types, Weirdness

I've Forbidden It from Watching Terms Of Endearment

Queer, after being rushed to play Scrabble: You don't understand what it's like having all vowels!
Drunk girl: You don't understand what it's like having a vagina, so who wins?
Queer: I do! I have an emotional vagina.

Long Beach, California

Overheard by: pucewoman

Posted on June 29, 2009
California, Compare and contrast, Drunks, Feelings, Games, Girls, Queers, Questions, Sexuality, Vagina, Words

So This Better Be at Least Three Karats.

(drunk boy pulls out diamond ring and offers it to drunk girl)
Drunk girl: Fuck you, Tim! You fell asleep at dinner!

London
England

Overheard by: Tequila Sally

Posted on June 22, 2009
Couples, Drinking & drunks, Drunks, England, Gifts, Insults

The Chemical Element?

Drunk man to another: If I had a nose like fluorine I wouldn't be wishing anyone a merry Christmas.

Bar
Edinburgh
Scotland

Overheard by: Jesse Green

Posted on June 17, 2009
Bars & Clubs, Body parts, Compare and contrast, Default, Drunks, Guys, Holidays, Scotland, Wishes

And Then Other Times I Vomit

Drunk guy walking past mirror: Man, sometimes I see myself, and I make myself horny.

Hanover College
Hanover, Indiana

Overheard by: Whitney

Posted on June 17, 2009
Colleges & Universities, Default, Drinking & drunks, Drunks, Guys, Indiana, Sex, Weirdness

Al Gore: “Some Day That'll Be True!”

Afternoon drunk: Nah, man, it's 32. That's freezing. It don't get lower than that.

Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: colder that him, apparently

Posted on June 7, 2009
Compare and contrast, Default, Drinking & drunks, Drunks, Guys, Illinois, Weather

And That the Nineties Are Over

Drunk teenage boy: Heyyy, ssssuuuuupp, buddd… (stumbles away)
Sober teenage boy: I guess he's too drunk to notice that we're not friends.

Red Bank, New Jersey

Posted on May 30, 2009
Default, Drinking & drunks, Drunks, Guys, New Jersey, Relationships, Teens, Words

According to Wiki

Drunk girl at pub table: It's just that guys get sex changes all the time and then realize it's not so fun. They just think it'd be awesome to have boobs.

London
England

Overheard by: Grew her own boobs.

Posted on May 14, 2009
Bars & Clubs, Body parts, Compare and contrast, Default, Drunks, England, Girls, Sex

Drunks