Drunk girl, very concerned: He's totally going to get fucked in the A! And he has scoliosis, so he's always bent over, so he's definitely going to get fucked in the A!
Macalester College
St. Paul, Minnesota
Drunk girl, very concerned: He's totally going to get fucked in the A! And he has scoliosis, so he's always bent over, so he's definitely going to get fucked in the A!
Macalester College
St. Paul, Minnesota
Drunk teacher: Those aren't coasters, they're pasties. (holds them up to her breasts)
San Diego, California
Overheard by: Heather
Drunk girl to guy she just met: I'm not having sex with you!
Drunk guy: That's okay, I'm on my period.
Montreal
Quebec
Canadia
Drunk chick: Haha, you're a cheeky queen.
Drunk queer: Don't call me a cheeky queen! I'm a dirty bitch!
Provincetown, Massachusetts
Drunk girl: Okay… I had three sausages, I gotta go to bed.
Drunk guy: Three? I had like eight shots earlier!
Drunk girl: No. Not shots, sausages.
Drunk guy: Oh my god! You ate three sausages? Go to bed!
Orlando, Florida
Overheard by: Pukey
Drunk bus rider #1: Damn, this bus is always so slow!
Drunk bus rider #2: I swear, if I was a wizard, I would turn this bus into a rabbit… But that's fantasy stuff, and I'm not that into fantasy.
Seattle, Washington
Stoned #20-something: If you could have sex with any fictional character, who would it be?
Drunk #20-something: Christopher Walken.
Stoned #20-something: He's not fictional.
(pause)
Drunk #20-something: He might as well be!
Louisville, Kentucky
Overheard by: Jessica
Crazy drunk lady, whispering: I think I got asbestos on my hands. (in louder voice) Or maybe it's sperm! Heeheeheeheeheehee!
Toronto
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: EdgingAwayFromHer
Drunk college dude, explaining how he got kicked out of a club: They looked at my ID, then they looked at my face. My face was not as sober as my ID.
Metro, Orange Line
Washington, DC
Overheard by: funniest Metro ride ever
Sober sorostitute with heavy smoker's voice: Like o-m-g, I just decided on my Halloween costume!
Drunk sorostitute, stamping feet: Oh my god! What?! What what what?
Sober sorostitute: Wait for it…wait for it… Little ho peep!
Drunk sorostitute: Can we have sex with the little ho sheep?
Duke University
Durham, North Carolina
Overheard by: Disgusted
