Slightly obese lady on cell: Of course I'm at the gym, honey! I promised to go to the gym today, so I'm at the gym! (hangs up, talks to friend) What an idiot. I want some ice cream.
Ice Cream Shop
Missouri
Overheard by: jeeves
Slightly obese lady on cell: Of course I'm at the gym, honey! I promised to go to the gym today, so I'm at the gym! (hangs up, talks to friend) What an idiot. I want some ice cream.
Ice Cream Shop
Missouri
Overheard by: jeeves
Grungy teenager to group of grungy friends: And then I ate half of a cardboard box!
Olympia, Washington
Overheard by: Claire
Indian girl to friend: When I have a baby, I'm going to name it after my pet rock.
King of Prussia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Amanda
Girl to friends: He looked like a Mexican vampire, and it did not work for me.
Clarksville, Maryland
Overheard by: I can see why
Angry girl to group of male friends: You can sleep with my mother, you can kill my father, you can burn down my house, but if you fuck with my bike…
Harvard University
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Veli Velo
Fun date #1: I hate it when guys want to cum on your face every time.
Fun date #2: Yeah, it gets in your eyes.
Fun date #1: And in your hair.
Fun date #3: Once in a while is okay, but not every time.
Outside Coffee Shop
Harrisonburg, Virginia
Overheard by: browny
Party goer #1: That girl is wasted.
Party goer #2: Which one?
Party goer #1: The one with the blue shirt and lip ring.
Party goer #2: That's not a lip ring, she's got a piece of meat stuck to her face.
Burlington, Vermont
Overheard by: Tim
Blind old lady to old lady friend: Oh my, you started peeing so fast.
Old lady friend: Yes, it's because I stand up.
Blind old lady: Ohhhh…
Old lady friend: Yes, not a lot of women know how to stand up, you know.
Blind old lady: Yes, that's true. My mother used to stand.
CSULA Women's Bathroom
California
Overheard by: itshahaholly
Guy among friends: This conversation is too logical for me.
Bar
Norway
Guy: Yeah, this woman over at the Sun-Times building used to make this focaccia bread for us, it was great. But she was Italian-American though, she didn't know, she didn't even know what a cannoli was!
Friend: What!?
Guy: Yeah! And, like, zeppoli, she didn't know what a zeppoli was either! And those are like the two big things, y'know?
Friend: Oh, man!
Guy: That's what happens! That's what happens when you mix up the blood!
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: SOB: Stale Off the Boat