Mom to three-year-old son under the table: Whatcha’ doin’ under there, buddy?
Three-year-old son: Playing volleyball.
Dad: Volleyball? Smells like you’re pooping your pants.
Three-year-old son, giggling: I am.
Three-year-old son’s sister to friend: See, I told you it wasn’t the food.
Los Tres Amigos Mexican Restaurant
Michigan
Overheard by: Scott
Girl: You should meet his dad! He's like Don Quixote in a Kafka story.
Guy: Who's father they were talking about…you know…but with a tv.
Sabiá bar, Vila Madalena
Sao Paulo, Brazil
Guy lying on girl’s stomach: Your bellybutton is probably the worst thing I’ve smelled this week.
São Paulo
Brazil
Overheard by: what about last week?
Guy on cell: You know you're the only person who calls this number. You have to stop!
St. Catharines
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Meg
20-something guy, about his sushi: This takes me back to when I used to live in Japan.
Brunette: When did you ever live there?
20-something guy: No, I mean in my past life.
Brunette: What makes you think you were Japanese?
20-something guy: Because ever since I was little I have always loved seafood.
Brunette: … Maybe you were a fish.
20-something guy: Not cool.
Sushi restaurant
Worcester, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Wallflower
Very pregnant woman: I don't want to have this baby. I don't want to have to work all of this weight off.
Man: I think I should keep you pregnant. This is the least worst you've ever looked.
Hasting's
Wichita Falls, Texas
Overheard by: mikeface
Guy on cell: Don't expect it to be as great as the last time we were in Malibu, though. Unless you bring your funny hat.
The Coffee Bean
Los Angeles, California
Well-dressed man to female companion, in crowded tasting room: Did you remember the dildo?
Elegant lady companion: Yes, I brought both of them.
Napa Valley wine Auction
St. Helena, California
Young guy: I know it’s stereotypical for a guy to want a girl who’s a freak in bed, but, really, it’s just so nice.
http://overheardinthevalley.blogspot.com/2007/03/what-leonard-cohen-neil-young-and.html
Beefy tattooed inmate: Hey, does anyone know how to play twister?
(rest of unit groans)
Vancouver Island Maximum Security Prison
Canadia
