Nurse: How are the bowel movements?
Patient: Define “bowel movements.”
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/363326029/we-may-need-a-bigger-needle.html
Overheard by: Not a Dr
Nurse: How are the bowel movements?
Patient: Define “bowel movements.”
http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/overheardinminneapolis/~3/363326029/we-may-need-a-bigger-needle.html
Overheard by: Not a Dr
Girl #1: Aren't you proud of me?
Girl #2: I am! But I'm also proud of you for other things, like… (long silence)
Tiger Noodles
Princeton, New Jersey
Overheard by: Brokeass Harem
Zookeeper, to penguin pecking at her shirt: Am I dirty? Am I a dirty little birdie? Do I need preening?
Mystic Aquarium, Connecticut
Woman visiting Seattle with daughters: Guess what daddy is doing down in Portland right now!
Four-year-old girl: Going to a bar?
Seattle, Washington
Skinny woman: So what do you do?
Fat woman: I'm a dietitian.
Skinny woman: You should give me some advice!
Menands, New York
Queer #1: I remember you! Are you Jewish?
Queer #2: No! I'm from Charleston!
Gay Strip Club
Atlanta, Georgia
Overheard by: Oh, thank god!
(Christian brother professor is chewing on the ice of his drink after lunch)
Student: Hey brother, you know what chewing ice is supposed to signify?
Brother: Yeah…sexual frustration.
Student (chuckling): Yeah.
Brother (shrugging): Occupational hazard.
LaSalle University
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Well D'uh
Man #1: Hi! How are you?
Man #2 (excited): Great! I'm going through a divorce!
Man #1: Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
Man #2 (still excited): Yeah! My wife was with another man!
The Woodlands, Texas
Overheard by: ….what?
Random biker chick: So, you just put your thong right on it?
Sturgis Motorcycle Rally
Keystone, South Dakota
Overheard by: KDH
